That is, until I realized I can only be me.
The reality is, performing for others is just too hard to sustain. The only thing I know how to be long term is myself. Someone once told me, “I outshine everyone else at being me,” and that’s what I need to remember.
The big question then becomes, “Who am I really?” and “Am I the reflection of God that I want to be?”
I’m not quite certain where I am with all that yet but I am so thankful for the way God has been showing up. I see Him and feel Him all around me. I see the face of Jesus in the eyes of the children from our ministry and the animals that roam the streets. I feel God holding me when the wind sweeps across my face on a blistering hot Dominican day. I know He’s whispering things in my ears when people share their heartache and out of nowhere I am filled with words of comfort. I understand His power when I need the comfort of my mom and He provides cell service in a no service area. His love is overwhelming and incomprehensible all at the same time and that’s beautiful.
My heavenly father is pushing me to fight for myself (and within that, my identity and beliefs) as well as my team. He doesn’t expect us to look or act like anyone else or any other team on J squad, but instead asks us to just simply be ourselves. For team Charis, that may mean that in some houses we don’t read from the Bible. Or that in others, when the homeowner says they aren’t interested in learning about Jesus, we let it go. But no matter what we choose to say out loud or keep in our hearts, we always carry with us the power of Jesus. I mentioned in the last blog that from the moment we walk in the door we are assigned the label: missionary. And with that label comes a hefty weight. There is power in that title and with it; God’s work is always being done.
Please enjoy the moments I’ve captured of God’s good works and beauty:
God’s creation: Scenes from the Caribbean
Playa San Racael! (translation: one of the most heaven-like places I've ever seen)
Better than a postcard…this is REAL LIFE
Instead of sand, the DR beaches are full of rocks…makes for a beautiful picture (but not the nicest feeling for your feet)
Views from our window (or close enough….sights from the town we are in for our ministry)
A real plantain tree. A staple fruit in the DR
A typical Dominican home….check out the view! Btws the field in front is also used as a baseball field (a favorite pasttime for most Dominican children).
Pigs are like regular household pets. Little, bitty, piggies, can you imagine!
The palm tree like plants you see in the background are the famous Dominican sugar cane plants.
The faces of the Dominican people
Need I say anything. How cute is that little pudge monster. Ahh!! I fell instantly in love with her. She is the daughter of one of the most faithful daughters of God I have ever met. She is so hungry to know more about God and my team had the pleasure of doing a Bible study with her
Take note: This 80 something year old man got his body all but 3 feet above the ground to sit on this can, because he refused to have his company (us) sit on the ground. You know how some people are just filled with the Holy Spirit, and nothing needs to be said, you just know it. He is one of those people.
In his words, "Mire! (translation: look). This little cutie couldn't be happier to have someone to play with
Our second day of ministry was a strain. We were still getting a hang of what door-to-door ministry really looked like for our team. But this woman seemed to really take a liking to us because she came to listen to our message twice (this is her at her neighbors house). This was also the first house where we really started to develop our own ministry style and really brought joy into their home.
Jumping rope and playing games inside the church. This open area is transformed into a sanctuary on Sundays by the simple addition of chairs and a podium. There is a single light bulb that hangs above the podium so the preacher(s) can read.
When we first met this beauty she didn't speak a word to us, she just observed. But by the end of the week she was clinging to us like glue and even got upset when she thought we were leaving. It's kind of funny how close we can get even without words.
This is my heart! There is really no other way to explain it really. I just melt when I see her. She glows with the joy of the Lord. She sat on my lap all during the Sunday church service. I will love her and remember her forever.
I am glad I got to introduce you to some of my new family members. Please know how I miss you all from home. Thank you so much for your kind messages and prayers of safety and growth. Until next time…
