While I was on the world race, my teammate Nick used to daily approach me and challenge me to “dream God-sized dreams.”
Now because I have a finite mind and an understanding of man’s hardwiring for a sinful nature, I don’t know how to “dream God-sized dreams.” Instead, I doubt.
I doubt there will ever be world peace because of the power struggle in a God-less society. I doubt world hunger will ever be ended because of the innate selfishness of man-kind. I doubt that sicknesses like cancer will ever be eliminated. I doubt that the media will ever be a good thing or set up a good image to feed into the minds of these generations. I doubt that there will be peace and cooperation between political parties like initially intended in America. I doubt racism will ever subside and all people will stand among each other as brothers and sisters. I doubt that I can make a difference in this world. I doubt my parents and I will ever see eye-to-eye. I doubt that I will ever be satisfied with what I look like, satisfied what I can and can’t do, and satisfied with who I am.
Then tonight, 6 months out of the race, my pastor shocked me with this simple question:
Is God is BIG ENOUGH?
Ok. I’ve never thought about this concept in such a simple way before. Immediately, as instinctively as I have lied countless times before, I told myself “of course, He is!”
Then I felt SO ashamed and all of my doubts rushed back to my mind reminding me that I had forgotten how big God really is.
Then my pastor challenged me with what my friend challenged me, with different wording but the same concept:
“Pray God-sized prayers.”
Ok, news flash, if you believe, then you know about the power of prayer. You know about the infinite power of the infinite God.
So do I really believe?
Yes.
…..do I pray like I believe?
Definitely not.
Why the heck not? Well, I am convinced that while I pride myself on being knowledgeable about the world and knowledgeable about the Bible and knowledgeable about so many things, I truly can’t see past the end of my nose. If I can’t see, I doubt. If I don’t have that evidence or a pattern or a physical sight of God, then I doubt. I have made Him so small. I have said, “Yeah, God, You can save me from hell and sure take all my sins and die for me. Thanks, I couldn’t do it without You” and I have limited Him to that. I have made Him so small that I won’t believe that He is trying to change the world, but I won’t let Him because of my unbelief. I have compartmentalized Him into little orderly sections of my brain like the one for Sundays, the one for devotions, the one for praying before meals, the one to pray before exams, and the one for small prayer requests for my friends.
I have made GOD finite.
Here’s the GOOD NEWS: God is Good, God is Moving, and God is BIG.
I cannot continue to live in my doubt, rather everyday I must become awakened to the reality of His power.
So I will pray.
I will pray and beg God to not let me become complacent and not let me fall into the patterns deemed acceptable to society.
I will PRAY and TRUST that I will be satisfied with who I have been created to be and THAT is the image of perfection NOT what the media convinces us all we are lacking.
I will pray that all women will see their worth as priceless and their intelligence as world-changing and their dreams as of immeasurable value.
I will pray for the children around the world who are separated from their families, who are starving, who are raised in father-less homes.
I will pray for the men, that they will be steadfast, that they will run and never grow weary.
I will pray for those afflicted by diseases and sicknesses, that they have a heavenly encounter with the Father and are healed.
I will pray for the peace of God which surpasses ALL understanding to wreck our lives and leave us in awe of Him.
So I ask you to pray. Pray like you believe it will be accomplished.
Please feel free to reach out to me with prayer requests!
God bless you,
Jaclyn
