Receive, receive, receive.
That was the whisper of God I heard in Thailand as I was gazing out over His beautiful ocean, and a whisper I have been hearing since.
Receive, receive, receive.
He has been showing me how difficult we find it to receive, from Him and from others. We often feel we don't deserve gifts, service, compliments, etc. unless we have earned them or reciprocated them. However, earning and reciprocation are not the ways of the Father; He instead loves to give freely, without strings or expectation.
God has been gradually revealing to me some things I do and believe that keep me from receiving. Although there are many layers to my struggle with receiving freely and fully, one that He highlighted is my consumption.
What do I mean by that?
Well, I have this consumer mentality most of the time. It's a byproduct of our business-dominated society and a way we are trained to think in American culture.
When I go on an excursion on an off-day, I want to get the most for my money. When I am hungry, I want to consume food that I will enjoy the most and will satisfy me. When I purchase something, I expect a certain quality of product.
These are just examples of a larger mentality of consumption and transaction. And it's not that any of these lines of thought are wrong; it's just that thinking this way often can seep into thinking this way towards other people, towards God, and towards life in general.
One apparent example for me is the sex tourism culture around us in Southeast Asia. Consumption is everywhere. As we saw especially in our ministry in Thailand, many girls are willing to be sex workers so they can consume the latest technology and material fad, but it makes it difficult for them to receive full life and real love. Same with the men; they are desperate to receive real companionship, but because they are consuming women, they have little hope of receiving any lasting salve for their loneliness.
You take something positive – a God-designed relationship between man and woman – and add consumerism into it, and it becomes a whole different thing. Something sad and twisted instead of something beautiful.
The difference between a heart that wants to consume and one that wants to receive is subtle but also drastic. Both want, and both seek; both are open to gifts and experiences.
However, an attitude of consumption is one of activity and fight, with hands grabbing voraciously and quickly at what they want. There is an underlying dissatisfaction in a consumption attitude.
Alternatively, an attitude of receiving is one of open hands. Receiving is marked by eyes opened to see all blessings, and an open heart towards gifts and experiences that come along organically. With a receiving heart, there is patience and gratitude in it's wanting.
I realized I often come to God expecting to consume Him; I come at Him, grabbing and scraping for His wisdom, His direction, or His Presence. I come to Him desperate, almost demanding. And although He often still shows up, there is something missing in that kind of relationship. This is not how God designed it to work.
He has much more peace and confidence about our interactions. He seeks me always, sometimes relentlessly, other times softly and gently. But always. There is no insecurity in how He reaches for me, no fear of how I will respond. He doesn't have an agenda for our interactions, or something He needs to accomplish. He is always just wanting to be with me. And He just wants me to be with Him too, to receive His presence and his goodness.
Sometimes He doesn't want me to do anything with Him or for Him; other times He just wants me to sit with Him
Some mornings He wants me to pray hard for people I love; other times He just wants me to sit there, saying nothing, and bask in His love.
Sometimes He wants me to explore and do every adventure possible on my off day; other times He wants me to chose just one and really soak it in, enjoying and appreciating life in the process.
Sometimes enjoying snacks is a great little gift to appreciate in my day; other times, I don't need to buy snacks with my movie or a drink with my meal.
Sometimes He wants me to wrack my brains for how I can actively love and serve my teammates and my contacts; other times, He wants me to just look into their eyes, appreciate them as beautiful people, and spend some time with them.
I want to live each day really receiving life from God. I can try to fight for my life myself using the world's methods, but it is no use; I will only consume unsatisfactorily until I run dry.
Instead, I choose to receive. I choose to go to God with open hands, to receive life from Him. I gave Him my life years ago, and now my life is hidden with Christ (Colossians 3:3). It only makes sense I would have to go back to Him every day, with my hands open wide, to receive that daily abundance of life.
I choose to stop scraping and grabbing. It's exhausting.
I choose, instead, to receive.
Challenge to readers:
In what areas of your life has an attitude of consumption twisted the way your think and function?
How well do you receive from others?
How well do you receive from God?
Do you even ever go to God expecting to receive anything? (I.e. His blessings, His peace, His love, His Presence)?
This week, try it out. Try to receive in your life.
Go to God, the Giver of the best gifts. Ask to receive His love for you – ask to feel it. And then sit with Him and receive that intangible gift of Himself. If you go to Him asking in faith, it will be the best thing you do all week.
