The day I said yes to the World Race was the day fear started creeping in.
Signing up for the World Race has easily been the most exciting, daring thing that I have done in my entire life. It is also the most overwhelming. When I knew I was ” in” I was so excited! I immediately started looking up gear and equipment, and applied for my passport, made my first blog post, and had written my support letters all within the first few weeks of making my first official deposit. Then something happened. I began to think.
I’m not sure about most people, but when I get lost in thought, it’s hardly ever a good thing. My mind has a way of taking something and starts to play its favorite game of 21 Questions.
My mind: “Oh crap, that’s a lot of money. How am I supposed to raise that much??”
“What if no one supports me?”
“Am I even supposed to be going on this trip?”
“How am I supposed to raise all this money?!”
“When I get back will I have a job?”
“When do I stop working the job that I have now?”
“Fundraising??”
“Should I stay, or should I go??” (feel free to sing)
” Who’s going to give me that much money?!”
You get the idea.
These thoughts run through my head almost daily, and I think it does for most people when they get ready to make a life-changing decision.
Thoughts like these although familiar can also be crippling. You become so wrapped up in fear of the unknown that it keeps you from moving forward, which has revealed itself to ring true for me. It has also brought to my attention the tremendous difference between how much I thought I trusted God and how much I ACTUALLY trust Him. How much courage I thought I had and how much courage I ACTUALLY have. Believe it or not, it takes courage to trust God! God is the unknown, it’s what He’s all about.
I’m not sure if anyone else relates to this, but I have most of my epiphany moments (those aha! moments) when I’m driving. Some may have those moments in the shower. I just sing lol.
While I was driving to get my morning coffee headed to work, I tried to look at some construction that was taking place down the road, and some oddly shaped trees caught my attention as well. Let’s just say I didn’t exactly stay on the straight and narrow lol but I got back on track, and I realized something… I need to allow God be in the driver seat of my life.
You know those rare times when you actually get to sit in the passenger seat of a car and while going down the same road you’ve been down more times than you can count (while driving yourself) you notice a building or some oddly shaped trees or something that you just weren’t aware of before? And you ask or say to whoever is at the wheel “hey! That’s new.” or “how long has that been there??” and they look at you all strange and tell you it’s been there for years and your whole world changes lol. So the next time you’re driving down that same road, you always recognize that thing you didn’t before.
When you let God drive you are then able to sit in the passenger seat of life. Which is the best thing you could ever do because not only is He a better driver than you could ever hope to be. You have complete freedom and ability to first: trust Him with your life, and see things that you have never seen before and you can say “how long has that been there??” or “That’s new!” Then God can look at you strangely and tell you it’s been there for years! Lol Certainly when you go down those same roads of life or even new ones if you continue to let God be in the driver seat, you will never miss out on another oddly shaped tree for the rest of your life. Those things that need changing you can change, and those things you need to keep an eye on you’ll be aware of no matter where you’re going.
So as I head off on this journey, I’ll sit in the passenger seat. I for one like oddly shaped trees.
