18 year old Isiah Smith. Man, Get READY. Your world soon will never be the same. You’re going to experience a whole lot of first times! I have so much to say to you. So much advice to give you. But I’ll be honest man. I’m not going to give you much advice, No help. This year, its going to change your life.
By this time at 18, you are 1 month removed from graduating high-school. You just applied to Tulsa Community College. Who woulda thought that one day you would actually be a college student and working towards getting an edumacation. What else is going in your life? You moved out of your Mom’s house and into your Grandma’s, because ever since Mom got married it is as if you don’t exist to your mom anymore which is a huge deal considering your dad was never in your life. I understand bro. It sucks, you don’t know if anyone in this life truly loves you man. Your hurt I get it. You’re the type of person who doesn’t need anyone. But everyone needs SOMEONE. I’ll tell you that my man. You never let people into your life, into your heart. Because you just don’t want to get hurt. I remember junior year vividly riding the bus one morning. You told yourself I’m going to act depressed so someone can feel sorry for me. We both know that lasted about 5 seconds. You don’t like to see people hurt despite the fact you are hurt yourself. That’s a gift, that’ll come in handy someday.
So what else, bro? You’re 18, this is your prime. Everything in your life is going wrong. But you not depressed your enthusiastic! You’re doing something with your life. It may not be exactly what you planned but it is something. But here you are at TCC, no CLOSE friends. In high-school you were that friend hoe. You had friends in every “Category” Popular, nerd, geek, partiers, cheerleaders, cowboys, goth, emo etc… But you had VERY FEW close friends. At TCC You have a class with some friends that were on the football team. You never hung out with them. They were popular, you wanted to be popular but also knew that it meant nothing. But you have no friends to do anything with… So you make friends with them. They say “hey, we’re going over to tallys for lunch wanna go?” One of em pulls out a bag of weed and asked if you smoked. You say you never have and never will. So, here you are enjoying your college life working at QuikTrip just studying and working and going through life.
Its Friday night. Sand Springs and Sapulpa are playing. Hwy 97 rivalry, the biggest day of the year in these two towns. You’re with a girl, enjoying the game. We won that night! As your leaving, you see that group of friends from College. Hanging out with a group of friends that they shouldn’t be hanging out with. So, you go over to them and ask what’s going on. Well, long story short one friend from one group knew another in the other and decided to go to a party that night. So, now you have a choice to make. Continue to hang out with this girl. Or Go party, Which you never have done up to this point in your life. You decided to go party. Boy, how your life is going to change that night. Everybody is having a JOLLY time at this party. Except you, here you are just being your introverted self. Not drinking not smoking. A friend comes up to you and ask if you’ve ever smoked weed before? You say no, you see everyone else doing it and “you” what’s the worst that can happen? Everything in your life is going wrong. No one loves you So you hit it a few times and WOW. What a heck of a drug! Everything is hilarious! On the inside of me I’m not depressed. I’m happy! All of my problems are gone and all I’m focused on is having a great time in this moment. You have found your peace! But what you actually did was create a false reality. Now you’ve found the answer to all of your depression and your emptiness. Your trust is now in a plant. But it feels so right and so good.
But now you’ve met this girl. WOOOOOOOOOO IS SHE F I N E!
She’s about 5’4, olive skin, small waist, thick hips. You don’t really believe in God but she made you a believer right? Only God could design something that beautiful (laugh hahaha joke). You’re at the register and you see her walk in from employee parking. So, your first instinct is to run to the back of store and act like your working.. Because in a 8 hour shift you’re not going to come into contact with her in a 1500 square foot store. You’re shy, its okay it’s cool because she digs that. You’ve never kissed anyone up to this point in your life and been on very few dates. But this one somehow someway, you’ve got to make her yours. Even though she already has a man. But that doesn’t matter she got to be yours and once she is she isn’t going anywhere right? She’s going to be your first everything. She’s going to be your first kiss. You’re going to know her biblically. You guys are going to get married and have kids, I mean y’all talked about it and are going to try to. You found all your heart desires! You waited 18 years for her. She is THE ONE. Y’all go to church. But y’all don’t believe in God. Church is an excuse to get together.
Isiah, you’re doing things in your prior 18 years of existence you never did. Smoking pot, Drinking, having sex, watching porn. Listen dawg, I’m writing at 23 years of age. You’re 18 and went WILD and you’ll continue that for a few years.
Listen Isiah, I wish I could tell you not to do the things you did. But if I’m going to be real vanilla with you. That girl, know her biblically. That blunt, hit that blunt. That alcoholic beverage, indulge in that. Go down that deep dark path of depression and suicide. Keep getting high like you were. Do those you’re going to meet someone who knows you better than you know yourself. You got your heart broken by that girl. I know it hurts, man. I know it does. Your mom left you for a man. Your girl did the same. Your dad was never there. You don’t have a strong family. The 2 most important people in your life have absolutely crushed you. There is NO ONE here for you, or that’s how it seems.
One last thing Isiah. Your girl gave something and when you got it. It confused the heck out of you. She gave you a bible with your name on it. Weird right? You’re never going to pick that up and read it. You only go to church to be with her. Can I tell you something, dawg? That’s going to mean a lot to you very soon. Very soon you’re going to meet someone. Who has been in your life since the day you were born and a eternity before you were born. That bible with your name on it. Its going to remind you that God knew you before the foundations of the earth. That bible is going to remind you that whatever you go through, God is with you. That bible is going to remind you that nor height nor depth nor created thing can separate you from the love of God. That bible is going to remind you that when you’re going through the deepest darkest time of your life. God. Is. There. That bible is going to remind you that he has called you and set you apart for his Glory.
Isiah, make those mistakes it’s going to take you down a road I don’t want to see you go down. But its going to make you into the person you are today. God is going to use all of that to reveal himself. One day, God is going to use it for good and his Glory not just in your life. But in the life of those around you
