The word trust implies to place ones confidence in someone or in something else.
We often say we trust God with our lives…yet in myself I find areas where I haven’t.
A lot of times people will say trust God for your future spouse, though I think that’s good.
A friend once said what if God gave you your spouse for a short time and they died in a car accident. Would you still trust God?
It’s the whole “better to have loved and lost then to have never loved”
Paradox…
Or what if you remain single for your whole life? Would you still trust God?
I’ve grown comfortable being single it’s been several years since my last relationship. I’m content being single, yet find myself still wanting a women to share life with.
At times it seems like God puts wonderful people in my life for a short season and when I have interest in them he sends them far away.
About ten or more years ago I remember praying this prayer about a women I was interested in…”Lord if it’s your will draw us together if not send her far away.”
I recall in my spirit hearing the words “do you have a heart for Africa” I said no at that time…but that same question kept coming up. A week later the women I was interested in announced she would be going to Uganda in Africa for a year to serve The Lord.
God answers prayer, yet sometimes its not the answer you were expecting, He sent her far away…
I recall another time where a women became my friend and it seemed The Lord was leading her in the same direction. During an outreach I recall seeing her drive up to drop off a food dish wearing pajamas, hair not done no makeup and tired. I thought to myself who can this be that she would serve God and care for people such that she didn’t care about what others thought–please don’t misunderstand I’m a very sanitary person and am not saying to let yourself go or be unsanitary, rather sometimes people focus way to much on the outside and what others think–to me it said that she really cared about the people and ministry, that same day I thought I heard God say this is the person you will marry. Yet it didn’t happen.
So what am I saying?
-Don’t trust God for a spouse?
-I should have gone to Africa?
-Wear pajamas and let yourself go?
No rather trust God in all things…it’s my choice…it’s not easy, and to be honest I’m not there yet.
I remember thinking that I’ve waited so long for a women to marry and share my life with at times I’ve been angry and bitter– I like breakup songs more than love songs, I don’t like February 14th “singles awareness day”–Yet I thought after waiting so long what’s the point? And then the thought came, “I will become who God wants me to be not to be worthy of someone else or for someone else but rather because that’s who God wants me to be.”
That said, I still think singles must put ourselves in a place to meet people of the opposite sex who love the Lord and are going in same direction in life and get to know them. To the women I’d encourage you not to write off the nice church guys and put them in a permanent friend zone. To the men I’d encourage you to not be so focused on looks, I get that there has to be attraction, yet I’ve also talked with many older couples and few have model type bodies or looks.
I don’t think relationships are some magical thing where you don’t talk to them and then you find yourself at the alter marring them.
I’d love to travel to Africa and Asia one day…but I came on the Spanish route because I believed God was leading me here, it’s not about traveling the world just to do it, at present I’m not sure where God is leading for future.
I once thought I would wait to get married to travel and experience life, like life didn’t begin until you found your soul mate…yet I’m finding life is the present it’s happening now…and I will experience it and trust God with or without a wife.
