Oh my God! He’s so good, and he’s taking me on an incredible journey.
As I write this, I’m on a bus heading out of Trujillo. I’m passing by places I will likely never see agian. I’m leaving people I’ve just barely started to get to know. My heart is in a thousand places. There is sorrow in the goodbyes, and yet excitement in the days to come.
I’m honestly in such a weird place, but that’s ok. I’m finding it’s ok to not be ok, and that God loves to work through the trying times.
I’m going to miss our amazing host. I’m going to miss my friends who were amazingly hospitable even though we couldn’t hardly talk. As much as I’m going to miss them there’s no going back, at least not for a long while. So that begs the question, what type of an impact did I leave in the time I was there?
Life is crazy. God is allowing me to follow him on an incredible journey. However I feel like I’m constantly moving. It’s a weird predicament because I often have little time to leave a lasting impact. However it’s still possible to leave a lasting impression on someone’s life. I really found this out when leaving Kentucky for this missions trip.
I remember just before I left Kentucky the school which I was working for held a prayer meeting for me. A couple of boys got up and shared ways they felt I had impacted them. It was never anything big. I found the biggest impact I can make is in the little, but consistent ways I love people. Boys I knew for less then three months were challenged to love better, and had their eyes open to God’s love.
Now here in Trujillo I only had six weeks to show people the love of God. It’s been so crazy, a little rough, and yet ultimately amazing. I’ve grown in ways I couldn’t imagine, and today through tears and tough goodbyes I got an idea of the impact I’ve made in lives.
It pains me that sometimes I don’t get the chance to go deeper in relationships. Sometimes I get so caught up in the fact that I don’t even know where to call home anymore. Is it where I was born? Where I lived the most? Where I currently am? Honestly it doesn’t really matter. I have said “Yes” to God, and now I follow him where he leads. I’ve determined to live life chasing after God regardless off where he has me go. This constant moving is often so hard, but it also allows me to impact lives all over the globe. Honestly it’s getting to me even now as I leave Trujillo behind.
All I can do is love people well while I have them. Life is messy guys. I’m moving again. Tomorrow I’ll wake up in Lima. I’ll have to start all over agian. We’ll have to figure out a whole new city. We’ll have to build relationships from the ground up. It’s an interesting process, but I’ve learned so much in it. I’ve learned you never know what God has in store. You never have know when the last time you’ll see someone is. It’s just the reality of life. You have to learn how to seize every single day. I know in the past I’ve held back from people. I was scared to show love because I didn’t feel it would be returned. I didn’t want to share the love of Jesus because I didn’t want to be rejected. Some insecurities disconnected me from people I could have reached with the life changing power of God’s love.
I know this is a kinda sad takeaway, but there is so much to learn in the moving. First of all seize the moment. It sometimes feels like I need to invest in lives before they will listen to me. However, if you are living out the love of God, he can reveal himself in you in a moment.
Secondly trust God with your heart. If we trust in our relationships with others for our happiness we will be constantly let down. If you put your faith in God you can be able to love deeply, and be vulnerable without being destroyed when people leave or reject you. And that leads nicely to the last point.
Don’t be afraid to love unconditionally. Be open to people, and share the love that has been given to you. If you lay down your insecurities and open up to people you can change the world in an instant. Love is contagious. Love is so powerful. But sharing love always cost the one giving it. That’s still hard for me to grasp.
I challenge you guys to trust God, and love well, but honestly that’s challenging me. I’m starting all over in Lima tomorrow. I have to be willing to love people, who I know I’ll have to leave. I have to love people knowing it won’t be returned. It’s still a difficult concept. Along this journey God has revealed and removed so many insecurities, and is perfecting his love in me. It’s been an incredible journey.
So guys, love well and seize every moment. You got the power to change the world inside you. Don’t forget that, and don’t let your insecurities and fear hold you back from that.
