As most of you know, I spent the first month of the race in a small orphanage called Los Gozosos in Chimaltenango, Guatemala. It was a special needs orphanage for kids with disabilities and before that month I struggled with special needs children. In society, whether it is spoken or not, special needs children are looked down upon. In my eyes before month one, I knew they were God's children but as often as I saw them I didn't realize what amazing people that they are even though they are disabled.
The first month of the race was eye opening. Just simply meeting this kids and falling in love with them. Seeing them as God sees them, perfect sons and daughters. I can remember the countless hours of laughing with them and the countless kisses from them. I can remember the times of singing with them and I can remember Daniel's faith in Jesus. I remember all the stories of healing in each one of the kids and deliverance from demons in one of the girl's life.
I believe all of this was to prepare me for the special needs orphanage that we walked into last week.
It was a tough day.
We went to visit a orphanage for invalid children in Ukraine. It was an orphanage for the high-need invalid children. Some of the kids here have parents but most of the parents do not have the means to take care of the children, so they are sent here. As we drove onto the grounds a young girl greeted us. She had a buzz-cut, shorts, tank-top on and was waving at us. A smile never left her face as she followed us to the parking lot. We were greeted by her, mumbling in Russian, hugging us and trying to talk with us. Immediately, I knew it was going to be an interesting day.
Soon after, the ladies who were working in the orphanage greeted us and we gave them some special fluorescent lights for sanitizing that Bruce's friend had purchased. Then they took us to where the children live. When we walked in we were greeted with a potent blend of smells, mostly the smell of urine with a strong smell of Clorox that seemed to be an attempt the cover the true smell of that was hanging in the air.
We were taken into a reception area with couches to sit on and asked to wait there for a time. While we were waiting about three girls and five guys came into the room. They entered the room and immediately I was out of my comfort zone. Everything I had realized in Guatemala seemed to shrink back into my mind and I just sat there. I was immobilized, not by fear but it was just an awkward place to be in. Bruce was quick to invite all of us to greet the children and just sit by them. As time went on I began to remember the times in Guatemala, I also noticed Jill who was attracting all of the kids. Talking with them, giving hugs, saying hello in Russian and just becoming friends with them. It inspired me.
The kids left after fifteen minutes and we were taken up into another room. As we walked upstairs we were taken down a long hallway. There were room filled with beds on both sides of the hallways and at the end of the hallways I could hear the noise of children. As we walked into the room there were about twenty sets of eyes staring us down. Americans are a sight to see and having us in that place was very exciting for these girls. We introduced ourselves, where we were from and were told to go say hello to the kids.
I was walking around shaking the kids hands. The first sets of kids were sitting on the ground and one of them came running up to me and gave me a huge hug. He was smiling and very happy. Then I went down to greet the kids on the ground. I reached my hand out to shake theirs and they were hesitant at first. They weren't sure if they could take my hand and finally one of them did. The little girl reached out her hand, grabbed mine and her eyes lit up. She got so excited and quickly pulled her hand back. Then the next girl reached out and grabbed my hand, she was excited. They started whispering to each other in Russian and giggling back and forth. There was so much power in just touching their hand. It seemed to make them feel more accepted.
As I went down the row of kids, I was just shaking their hands. They were more used to it by now because the other people on the team were going around to them. Saying hello to them in Russian and shaking their hands. Then what I wasn't expecting on of the girls grabbed my hand, pulled my head down to her level and stared at me in the eyes. She didn't say a word; it was almost like she was looking into my heart.
We stood there in a deadlock gaze for what felt like two minutes. As she examined my heart, making sure my motives were in the right place and then she began to laugh. I passed the test. She laughed, hugged me and then released my hand. I remember thinking in that moment, "What just happened? Did she just look into my soul and see that it was good? Can she see with God's eyes?"
It really took me off guard. It took me back to the verse. Matthew 18:3: "Jesus said, 'I tell you the truth unless you change and become like the little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven.'" It was like God giving me a prophetic word through a girl not speaking. Just simply staring. It was a powerful moment. Before I had time to process more about what happened we were asked to leave the room. The workers said that the children become over stimulated and start to hit each other. So we quickly exited the room.
Then after some time outside we were taken into the room with the "kids who lay". They are deformed so badly that they are never able to leave their beds. One of the girls in the room was seventeen years old and had never left her bed in her whole life. She happened to be the one I spent the most time with.
I will tell you more about these children in part two…
