Have been in contact with leadership regarding whats next for me and what that looks like. As a group we have come to the conclusion that Matamoros Mexico is my next stop. There is a man there named Thomi Wilson who runs the Gateway, which is a missionary training institute. Will be going to help Thomi & be helped of Thomi. We’ve had some similar life experiences & I still need to put some of the past behind me. Hoping he can help walk through the process, it seems to be the direction God is leading. Though I am not always thrilled about the direction God leads I know He has my best interests at heart. Ministry time here on the race has not been a problem, in fact it has been awesome. I know this is my heart & part of my gift but to share the Lord more effectively people need to be able to see Christ in me. There are areas in my heart even at 35 that He is still not Lord.
So this journey is supposed to be an adventure, I guess adventures aren’t always scripted, they kind of just happen, day by day, moment by moment. It becomes about being humble, being obedient and jumping up on the cross again. How long does it take to die? Crosses stink & it makes me think of what He endured & that alone gives me the strength to continue to walk with Him. If you are praying for me you can pray that God will help me to open my heart to Him, all of my heart, especially the pain. I touch it once in a while & run from it. Pray that I can embrace it & release it & then that He will fill those places with Himself & the capacity & wisdom to help others through theirs. Pray that God will help me to remove the log from my own eye. For me this pain in my heart, I believe to be the root of much that enslaves me. I’m still sick but feel much better physically, I’ve had the runs for a week & have been depressed for about a week. On a more positive note I have been spending time with a guy from Manhattan named Brian who’s an addict & he’s opening up more & more. He comes looking for me, asking how to get clean. Please pray for Brian & that God will give me the words to reach him. Adios. Hugh.
