Hello from India!
I have been off the mission field for about five days, due to a rash that developed through out my team about a week ago. We are all healing, Praise the Lord! Through this time off I have been learning a lot from the Lord, and I wanted to take the time to share it with you all!
My first couple of weeks have been rough. I have cried more than I could have ever imagined and the feeling of homesickness was so fierce. There is something to say about being stripped away from everything, no internet, out in the village, and not having the ability to turn to a human for comfort. I had to make the choice to turn to God in those desperate moments, but I chose not to. I was honestly questioning God on a number of things. What is my purpose here? Can I just go home now? I gave up everything to be here and now you abandon me?
God was still working out the fact that I needed to let go of my comfort of home and really ask myself, is Jesus enough for me?
Then a rash plagued my body. One that covered my face to where it looked like I got in a fight with a cat. Then it continued to spread. I was in so much pain and uncomfortable. Through this whole process my team continued to choose joy and laugh at the situation, because this was really all we had.
The Lord was teaching me a lot about suffering for His name, but He also brought me to a place where all I could do was lean on Him. A human was no option for me to run to, that Jesus had and is enough for me.
While we had a rest day, God brought me back to the book of Hosea ( 2: 14-20 & 3: 1-3). Which ironically is one of the first books that made me understand who God is. God was alluring me, and He spoke tenderly to me and said “Hope, I love you! I will always be enough for you, but only if you allow me to be.” Then chapter 3 came, which stung a little. God was talking about the concept of being a Whore and choosing other people and things before Him. This was my life in this moment. I was choosing to look to people to be enough. I was wanting the choice of being comfortable. I was choosing everything BUT the One is and always will be enough for me.
God brought me back to the place where it all started, to remind me who I am and the way He loves me so tenderly. I know Jesus is enough for me and that He is all I will ever need. This process is something that I am still struggling with in this moment, but I am okay with that because I know that Jesus is enough for me!
Keep praying for healing over Team Exuberant Peace! Love you all dearly!
In It For Good With Him,
Hope
