By nature, I’m not that open with my feelings and inner thoughts. I commit to work against my nature and develop openness in my blogging that I pray comes from the Lord…and not the pride and insecurity that would tempt me to write to appease others or even worse, write to make me look good. I struggle with that but want to embrace opportunities for me to look silly in order for the Lord to look good. I’m cool with that in my head, but have to tell that to my stupid pride…yay for grace!
Since Training Camp, I’ve been emotionally down and up. The first week was a flurry of bad habits and trying to describe the indescribable experience to my friends and family. First day back, I used the motivation tell my employer (of 12 years) and co-workers about the plan to world race my way through 2010…yes, I waited to commit until after training camp. The response from work was “go with our support and come back to a job next year”…..wow, humbling. My co-workers have been very supportive and encouraging. This is a big blessing…thanks God!
To describe my experience at camp, 115 strangers came together, we worshiped, we cried, we confessed, we prayed, we danced, we shared, we grew in the Lord, and we became a team in love with each other and in love with the adventure ahead of us! I was placed on a small group/family team of 6 girls who are amazing. We call ourselves
Team Radiance! Check out my team’s blogs
here and see us below after approximately 8 days of no hair washing. 🙂 My squad of about 60 people is the bigger family. We have some dynamic leaders and outspoken people who love the Lord and encourage each other to be in the word, pray for each other, and love each other. You can check out our team site at on My Links/Team Blog Page/Recent Posts to see what my teammates are writing. I’m pretty humbled by this group of really excited people who are ready to go out and serve.
The AIM organization and World Race staff equipped us with a lot of logistical details and information to keep us safe, healthy, and supplied as we trek around the world with one 40lb backpack filled with everything we need for a year. Most importantly they sent us out, armed Ephesians 6 style, with the Holy Spirit as our help to: pray, serve, love, hold, and witness to those the Lord leads us to in 2010. I feel unworthy and uneducated for this task, but do believe with the Lord’s help He will be glorified through my weakness!
This year, I will pay attention to the sadness I always want to ignore. I will engage the drama. I will come along side the poverty, illness, and filth that is REALITY in our world. God, please give me strength and emotional stability to deal. I’ve pacified myself a lot in life to avoid feeling my feelings. Sadly, I’ve used my vices to lull me away from introspection and growth. No more. Christ didn’t die for me to live pacified. I truly want more…that’s why the World Race is in front of me. Can’t wait.
