Here in Nepal church is slightly different than in America firstly it’s on Saturday instead of Sunday. Secondly when missionaries come to town be prepared to preach, share a testimony and usually sing a song.
Monday of last week Carmella (squad leader) said she needed 21 people to go to church Saturday that meaning seven groups of three. One person to preach, one person to sing and one person to share their testimony at seven different churches. Juliana volunteered herself for preaching and without thinking I said I’ll give my testimony. Not really sure where that came from or why I was so willing but I was.
Leading up to Saturday, giving my testimony was constantly in the back of my head, what was I thinking? Now I have to share in front of random people I don’t know and tell them about my life story. That terrified me, so naturally I put off writing my testimony because I thought I didn’t know how put it into words. I also found out that three of our guy squad mates were coming and for some reason I no longer wanted to share, it’s different telling my story to strangers or to ladies I’m in relationship with but the guys on my team that I haven’t bonded with yet. It made me feel shameful it made me feel like they would look at me different.
Also last week Juliana felt that God was calling her to share her testimony on her blog (go read it Julianagrinols.theworldrace.org) we had many conversations, about how hard it was and how so many people would be blessed by hearing her story. I encouraged her but didn’t fully understand the weight she felt from telling her story. Until Friday night when I finally sat down to write out my testimony, I began having the same freakout moments she had days before, she encouraged me and reminded me that my story wasn’t even about me it was ultimately about God and what he has done in and through my life.
Fast forward to Saturday morning we’re on a bus to the Nepali church, again another freak out moment of holy crap I really don’t wanna do this. I don’t wanna give my testimony in front of everyone, I was so nervous. We finally made it to the church after an hour bus ride in traffic. Upon arrival we were told there would be three services, now this made me even more nervous I wasn’t just gonna give my testimony once but three times in one day, this seemed awful! As we were sitting through the first service, I leaned over and told Juliana she could give her testimony this service and I would give mine in the second service, she then guilted me in to changing my mind and then I was back on board with giving it the first service. Well right after I agreed to share, the pastor gets up after Jack and begins to close the service, he didn’t actually want anyone to give their testimony this service. This was a relief but actually only made me more nervous for the second service.
So after coffee and biscuits and a short break between services it was time to head back into the sanctuary for church. We go find a seat on the floor and I begin to journal, as I was journaling during worship a song came on that I recognized. It only took me a few moments to realize what song it was, it was the song Power of your love. I immediately starting freaking out and was so happy. Let me give you a lil background on why this song made me happy and made me freak out. So about four years ago I went on this retreat called Vida Nueva, this retreat has a certain theme for each weekend and a particular song, the theme of my weekend was power of your love, that was the song as well. Over the weekend the song is played about a million times and by the end of it your joking about how you’ve heard the song way to much. That weekend four years ago changed a lot for me, it changed how I viewed God and grew my relationship closer, if I were to look back at a time in my life that changed me the most, that’s where my 180 happened.
So when this song came on I immediately felt the presence of God and knew that I was okay and that I was good to give my testimony. Who knew that four years ago when I heard that song, that it would be played in a Nepali church service to bring me comfort, when sharing my testimony.
I just love how even in the little moments God cares, he cares for his children. He wants to comfort you when your scared, he want to hold you and let you know he’s right there, in your obedience he didn’t leave you. I think that there are a lot of times when God ask us to do something and we think he leaves us as soon as we say yes, but this isn’t how God works. In Hebrews 13:5 it say that God will never leave your or forsake you. I think that we need to seek him more in the small things, find God everywhere we are. PEACE
XOXO
Heather
