anyone that knows me well knows that one of my greatest loves is fireworks. i don’t know what it is about them – the sound they make when they go off…the anticipation that builds between the time they are fired and the moment they explode…the shooting colors lighting up the sky…the “oohs” and “aahs” from the crowd that’s gathered…or just sharing the time with friends and family.
so as i prepared for the race, i prepared myself to miss friends, family, holidays, my dog, my bed…and fireworks. yes, fireworks quite possibly ranked among the top 10 things i prepared to “grieve” not having this year. laugh freely…go ahead…but honestly, i really thought i wasn’t going to see fireworks all year. yeah – SO wrong in the best way. around the world, not only do people not need a special reason to shoot a few fireworks off…but when a special reason does roll around, people go nuts.
tonight – new year’s eve – was no exception. we just enjoyed the most impressive fireworks display that any of us will probably ever see. atop a hill overlooking all of Manila, we watched fireworks light up the entire horizon for over two hours. big beautiful bursts of color and an orchestra of booms, “oohs,” “aahs,” and laughter filled the air…although i think the laughter was mainly our own in response to seth’s narrating and danny’s vocal stylings. they added extra entertainment to the show (which was, no joke, neighbors vying for “best of 2007” honors…doesn’t seem like an inexpensive or particularly safe competition, but certainly an awesome one…). while seth pointed out every firework in every direction saying “did you see that one?” “no, wait – did you see that one? that was joy,” danny was either making up songs or sing-humming “auld lang syne” (because seriously, does anyone really know all the words to that song?). i was in awe of the whole thing, and as we got closer to midnight, the show just got better and better until the entire skyline was full of golden willows, silver sparkles and colorful bursts of every shape and size.
i stood on that hill tonight reflecting on a year that leaves me speechless. a year ago, i would have never never imagined myself at this place – personally, spiritually, or geographically.
personally, i liked where my life was headed. i was loving being back in minnesota. i had found a cozy place of my own. i was making wonderful new friends and growing closer to old ones. i was starting to get comfortable in my own skin. i was diving into things i am passionate about.
spiritually, i was growing and certainly a faithful follower, but i didn’t allow myself to depend fully on the lord. i had a place to call home. i had a car to get me anywhere i wanted to go. i had friends and family who knew me – listened, encouraged, challenged, loved me. all of my major needs were met on my own strength, and if there was something more i needed or wanted, i could just worked a little extra to make it happen. honestly, as much as i pursued him, i wasn’t allowing myself to lean fully on him for everything.
geographically – well, geographically’s a no-brainer.
but it wasn’t about my plan or where i thought i was going personally, spiritually, geographically, emotionally, physically or any other “-ally.” god’s plan is so much bigger than our imagination, and tonight he impressed on me, yet again, that all he calls us to do is to delight in him. simply delight in the life he’s breathed into us…in the way he has created us in his image – not physically, but in our heart…in creation…in each other…in his children. if we are simply obedient and walk in that, he rewards us in the most simple, subtle and extravagant ways.
…like putting you in the middle of paradise for six weeks.
…like allowing you to reach out to and build relationships with his beautiful people.
…like giving you experiences that make you smile so much your cheeks hurt.
…like blessing you with 25 friends that naturally become family.
…like providing holiday celebrations around the world that rival anything you’ve ever known.
…like putting on a fireworks show so beautiful that you have to stop and remind yourself that yes, this really is my life.
delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart.
– psalms 37:4
