A friend recently used the word “inspirational” to describe me.
This was genuine and encouraging.
But today…
Today I found myself questioning how well that description fit.
Today was an “is-this-amounting-to-anything” kind of day.
Do you ever experience that?
Today –
After sleeping through my alarm and getting nothing done on my To Do list, receiving two vaccination shots, plus two booster shots, plus an additional one because the syringe broke in my arm (I’m okay! It sounds worse than it was.) And just now realizing that a cheque I mailed this morning was filled out wrong….
The feelings of inadequacy are rolling in like storm clouds on the horizon.
To be plain, there are a lot of big questions in my future:
How will the finances for my World Race come in?
Sometimes the numbers scare me.
How will this travel-dream I’ve chosen to pursue (and beyond) pan out?
Sometimes the risk factor is eye-to-eye with my courage level.
Have I chosen a path that will leave me permanently single?
Sometimes I wonder if this is the price I’m paying.
I’m just being honest here.
Do you have thoughts like these?
So here I sit –
Alone in a quiet old house.
It’s dark outside and my toes are cold.
But I know this to be true:
I have yet to make a decision with God that didn’t work out in the end.
Sometimes it’s a bumpy ride getting there, but the view at the top has always been worth it.
“We know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.” (Romans 8:28)
It was God who put the World Race on my radar. It was Him who re-ignited my long lost dreams. He is the one who is reflected in every detail as I move forward. He is working out something good.
And I love Him.
I may not feel all that inspirational right now…
But I know something good is being worked out in me.
And FOR me.
Which is a truth I can put my trust in.
Tomorrow is a new day…
And we’ll see if I can lift my arms after all those shots. 😉
