It’s that time, folks. B-squad is officially halfway through it’s World Race!
Nearly six months have passed since I’ve seen my family, my friends, attended my church, gone dancing, went for a walk at Rutledge, eaten Chipotle, slept in my own bed, driven my car, or felt socially competent in society. But I am content. 🙂
I view this halfway point as transitioning from leaving everything behind to now working my way back toward home. Five and a half months traveling away, and now we’re starting the journey back. I pray I don’t let it pass me by!
This blog is a reflection on the past 5-6 months:Things I’ve learned, things I wish I would have packed, things I miss. In order to be efficient with time and space, I have cataloged a collection of lists under a variety of categories. I hope you enjoy. 🙂
Best Packing Decisions
-
Cozy, grey, Smartwool socks. Rainy days, cold airplanes, tile floors: warm socks for the win!
-
Notebook rather than my laptop: smaller, lighter, just as effective.
-
Smartphone: I miss my flip phone, I confess. But my smartphone lets me have one device for communication, pictures, and music.
-
My own shampoo and conditioner. The team supply budget covers getting shampoo and conditioner, but that means we usually buy the most inexpensive kind, which is economical, but I try to take good care of my hair so that I can be lazy with my hair. Back home this looks like washing it only once a week with baking soda and apple cider vinegar, but those are heavy and not as readily available outside the States. So I brought some nice, sulfate-free shampoo/conditioner and still only wash my hair about once a week. My first bottles have lasted me until now, and I was able to get a second round of the same kind that will last me until I get home. Granted, for a month I was using lice-killing shampoo instead, but that’s a long story…
-
Good tennis shoes. I bought a pair of Merrell brand trail runners on clearance on Amazon and they are perfect. They’re lightweight, but sturdy, great arch support. I trust them for walking, jogging, hiking, and they are holding up so well. I’m so glad I left my $30 K-mart running shoes at home.
-
Small pack and day pack: My big pack is 55 liters, and my day pack is 25 liters. I wanted to limit myself on how much I could pack, and I rather enjoy having smaller/lighter than most bags to haul around.
-
Kindle: I almost left my Kindle at home because I can use the detachable screen from my notebook to read books, but I don’t regret for a second going ahead and bringing my actual Kindle.
-
Smartwool socks and underwear. They don’t retain odor as badly as regular cotton undies, and they dry very quickly.
-
Body spray/perfume. I like to smell nice. Or at least not to smell bad.
-
External power source. My older brother bought me a power bank that, when fully charged, lasts me about a week charging all of my devices. An excellent aid on travel days.
Packing Regrets…
-
Clothes I don’t like. I read numerous blogs that recommended bringing clothes you don’t care too much about in case they get ruined or left behind. This is terrible advice. Bring clothes you enjoy wearing and would wear in your regular life! I’ve systematically replaced at least half of my World Race wardrobe with clothes that I actually like.
-
Sneakers. My favorite go-to shoes back home are a simple pair of canvas sneakers from Wal-Mart or Converse All Stars when I can afford them. Chacos on the Race are great, but most of the time I miss a good ol’ pair of chucks. I’m hoping to pick up an inexpensive pair in Asia…
-
Vitamins. I don’t take vitamins at home. I started taking them on the Race and they just made me feel weird, so I threw them away month one.
-
Pajama pants. I didn’t bring a separate article of lower-extremity clothing for the expressed purpose of slumber. When your wardrobe is already limited, and especially when you get dirty at your ministry, your plan to ‘just sleep in my regular clothes’ is a bad one. Sigh…
-
Hand fan. I have a beautiful fan back home that I keep in my dance bag, but I forgot it. I bought one in Colombia, and it’s one of my most useful possessions at present.
-
Liquid Alive. I intended to buy this product to help with the smell of my dance shoes back home, but never got around to it. But now I wish I had it because Chacos smell terrible after six months, and our next five months are in the heat of Asia…
Things it Was Hard to Leave Behind…
-
Friends.I brought every card and letter that people wrote to me as an encouragement or send-off for the World Race, and I have pulled them out and read them at least once a month, a few of them every two weeks. And people back home still have lives to live – their world isn’t revolving around my absence, ha, so even when I have time to call home, sometimes my friends aren’t available. That’s hard, but it reminds me the Lord is my only true constant.
-
Church. We’re serving in ministry, often attending regular church services, and even worshiping together as a squad. But I miss the regular assembly of my local body of believers for fellowship and public proclamation of God’s word and worship, in English. I miss the authority and ordinances of the local church. I miss everything about my church.
-
Dance. I’ve taken West Coast Swing dance lessons for 3 years, and have rarely gone more than a week solid without getting to go to a social dance. Now I’m six months out and I’ve been able to teach a left-side pass to a few people on my squad, but I miss the social dance floor. A lot.
-
My autonomy. I miss being able to go outside at night. I miss being able to wake up on Saturday morning, go run errands, drive up to Ha Ha Tonka state park if I want, go shopping, go on a day trip with friends, you name it, without having to ask permission or report to anyone. I miss being able to be completely off the grid.
-
My job. The Lord blessed me to work at a family business in Springfield where I more or less developed my own system/position over the years, and I was really good at it. I loved my coworkers, and had amazing flexibility and trust from my boss. Express Press was my family, my home. But it was time for that season to end, and while I miss it, I know that’s no longer my place in this world.
Disciplines I’ve Developed/Been Able to Pursue on the Race
-
Waking up early – Back home I was the person who, if I had to be at work at 8:30, would wake up at 8:15. These days, if I am not awake at least two hours before I need to be ready, I feel like my day started in a rush. I also relish the quiet morning hours before everyone else wakes up because on the World Race, you are never alone. I plan to keep this habit post-Race, especially if/when I have my own family.
-
Bible reading – I read the Bible back home, usually on my lunch break, but I was disciplining myself for discipline’s sake, which, as Don Whitney says, is drudgery. My perspective has been renewed and now I read in order to know the God who saves me and whom I serve, and to grow in godliness. That brings joy, not drudgery.
-
Prayer – I also prayed back home, but I’ve grown in both my understanding of prayer and my methodology.
-
Fasting – I have never fasted before coming on the Race. Our squad did a 24 hour fast last month to pray for those of us still needing to raise funds, and the Lord provided. Now I am building fasting into my regular spiritual disciplines in my pursuit of God and godliness, and am thankful for the growth in closeness/dependence on the Lord.
-
Journaling – I’ve tried journaling in my life before but was never able to make it something useful for myself as opposed to one more ‘chore’ on a long list of things to do. Now, however, I find I have so many thoughts, questions, things I want to remember, observations, etc. that I have to write it down somewhere lest I forget. My journal is less of a “dear diary…” kind of journal and more of a, “I can’t forget this!” or “I want to meditate on this…” If you’ve ever read Harry Potter, it’s kind of like a more reality-based version of Dumbledore’s pensieve…
-
Personal Worship – We often say our whole life is to be worship, which is true when we define worship in particular ways. But now I am striving to include personal worship time in the form of music, singing, and writing… I try to before bed each night listen to a worship song and seek the Lord’s forgiveness for any sin I committed that day so I can sleep well knowing my heart is oriented toward him and nothing is hindering our relationship.
-
Reading/Learning for growth – I read so many good books in Bible College and Seminary. Now I am rereading so many of them because I want to learn and grow from them, not just read them for a grade… which isn’t how it should have been, but indeed is how it was so much of the time.
Truths/Lessons I’ve Learned, Re-Affirmed, or Actually for the First Time Actually Learned/Obeyed
-
God is faithful to accomplish the sanctification of his children, regardless of whether I am aligning my agenda with his or not.
-
Jesus Christ truly is our mediator. The only way God’s high sovereignty and holiness can be reconciled with his personal, fatherly care for all those who believe is Jesus Christ, God’s son. Fully God. Fully man. Duh, Christology 101. But I get it now, in a way I didn’t before.
-
I really do believe in the authority of scripture as God’s inerrant, infallible, written, special revelation for our lives, faith, and practice. But this does not ever give me license to criticize others from a prideful heart, nor to step outside of love for them.
-
We must not waiver on the necessity of biblical understanding of the gospel of Jesus Christ as the basis for salvation and sanctification. Not ever. That is a hill I will die upon.
-
God’s love for us is not based upon us. It is based upon his reputation, his glory, his character, his nature. When I see and understand God’s love for me, the right response is to worship him. Not to think upon how great I must be that he loves me so much.
-
God is a mastermind. Have you ever read Ephesians chapter 1? It’s so good! I am amazed at how God, in his infinite, manifold wisdom, before the foundation of the world, planned for us to be adopted as his sons and conformed to the image of Christ. Everything that has happened throughout all history has worked together to accomplish the salvation and sanctification of all those who believe in Jesus, to the glory of the grace of God the Father. He has orchestrated all of history, including every individual path of every believer in such a way that it works for their highest good, and his maximum glory. Furthermore, he did so in complete accordance of the entirety of his nature. Everything God has done and said is done in perfect harmony of all his grace, mercy, compassion, love, justice, holiness, righteousness, justice. No wonder he is the source of all wisdom… incredible.
-
Our compassion for people must derive from their need for their Creator. Our service and ministry to the needs of others must always be rooted in and point them back toward the gospel. People are helpless and hopeless without Christ. They need him more than they need food, water, shelter, safety… “Our most basic need is separation from Creator.”
- God is good, God is sovereign. Proverbs 3:5-6 and Matthew 6:33 mean I can devote my efforts/energies to knowing and obeying the Lord and he will direct my life as he sees fit. What a sweet promise! Oh that we would walk in it more and more…
