The World Race is an amazing adventure – I enjoy my team, and I love them with a sense of protectiveness. They are becoming family. I’m enjoying seeing God’s creation, and seeing what he is doing among the nations: It’s truly incredible!
The World Race is also hard sometimes. You are removed from everything familiar, giving up your personal autonomy, and your friends are thousands of miles away. And some days it just hits you harder than others.
Last night I really missed home… I really wanted to go watch a movie with my friend Adam, be at work again with my sweet Lori, and end the day alone in my bed falling asleep to Netflix. But Adam and Lori are on a different continent, and I don’t have internet at my house this month. So instead I ate some cookies and fell asleep listening to my rainy day playlist, reading past text message conversations on my old flip phone (which I am using as my alarm clock this year – don’t judge me). Did that make me feel better? Not really. I woke up still feeling sad, displaced.
Then I went to the bathroom.
But not this one – this came from Google images. 😉
Anyway, while I was tearing off some toilet paper, the Lord brought Psalm 103 to my mind, one of my favorite passages in the Bible.
After flushing and washing my hands, I went over to my little corner of our living room and read that chapter, thinking through each sentence and what it says about who God is and who I am in relation to him. I copied it into my journal, and prayed through some of the versus, and little by little my heart transitioned from self-centered sadness to God-centered contentment. A process we seminary kids call “self-counsel.” By the time we got on the bus to come to this coffee shop for the WiFi, my heart and mind were in a much better place.
When I am unsatisfied in life, the problem is not that I am lacking something. The Lord is my shepherd, I lack nothing. Instead the problem is that I am trying to find satisfaction outside of the Holy God of scripture. Turning to Netflix, cookies, or friends are fixes that don’t last: they can’t change my heart, and I’ll still wake up feeling awry.
I will only find true and lasting satisfaction in God himself.
I’m thankful for God’s new mercies each morning. I’m thankful for him reminding me of Psalm 103 today. I’m thankful that his self-revelation is written down for me in my language, multiple times over and with study notes. I’m thankful that he has given me the Holy Spirit who gives me power to apply the truth of that scripture to my life, renewing my thoughts, transforming my heart, and consequently redeeming my feelings. I’m thankful for my friend Sally who is a source of accountability for me today. And I’m thankful for God’s loyal love for me as one of his chosen, his adopted daughter.
I hope this passage will be a blessing to you today, as it was to me:
Psalm 103 [NET]
By David.
1 Praise the Lord, O my soul!
With all that is within me, praise his holy name!
2 Praise the Lord, O my soul!
Do not forget all his kind deeds!
3 He is the one who forgives all your sins,
who heals all your diseases,
4 who delivers your life from the Pit,
who crowns you with his loyal love and compassion,
5 who satisfies your life with good things,
so your youth is renewed like an eagle’s.
6 The Lord does what is fair,
and executes justice for all the oppressed.
7 The Lord revealed his faithful acts to Moses,
his deeds to the Israelites.
8 The Lord is compassionate and merciful;
he is patient and demonstrates great loyal love.
9 He does not always accuse,
and does not stay angry.
10 He does not deal with us as our sins deserve;
he does not repay us as our misdeeds deserve.
11 For as the skies are high above the earth,
so his loyal love towers over his faithful followers.
12 As far as the eastern horizon is from the west,
so he removes the guilt of our rebellious actions from us.
13 As a father has compassion on his children,
so the Lord has compassion on his faithful followers.
14 For he knows what we are made of;
he realizes we are made of clay.
15 A person’s life is like grass.
Like a flower in the field it flourishes,
16 but when the hot wind blows by, it disappears,
and one can no longer even spot the place where it once grew.
17 But the Lord continually shows loyal love to his faithful followers,
and is faithful to their descendants,
18 to those who keep his covenant,
who are careful to obey his commands.
19 The Lord has established his throne in heaven;
his kingdom extends over everything.
20 Praise the Lord, you angels of his,
you powerful warriors who carry out his decrees
and obey his orders!
21 Praise the Lord, all you warriors of his,
you servants of his who carry out his desires!
22 Praise the Lord, all that he has made,
in all the regions of his kingdom!
Praise the Lord, O my soul!
