As Christians, we’re not of this world and we’re not supposed to be. The fact is that our lives shouldn’t make sense to the rest of the world…they just shouldn’t.
When I went to Uganda in 2008 I learned what it means to truly love unconditionally with the children there. I learned more about God’s love for me and what that love looks like when poured out onto those around us. As we often say here on the world race: Be free…I got a glimpse of what it means to be free when I lived in Uganda. When asked how I was people truly wanted to know, not like in America where we ask how someone is as a formality…but really how often do we stick around to hear the answer? I’m just as guilty of this…
It was rough for me to leave Uganda. I don’t mean it was just hard to say goodbye, I mean I bawled saying goodbye to the mamas, to the children, and even to my friends. It hurt like hell to leave and I was perfectly fine being open about that. When I retuned to the states after those 2 months I kept the same mentality of being free. When others asked me how I liked being back I told them that I didn’t, I didn’t want to be back in America…I wanted to be in Uganda, that’s where my heart was. When people asked how I was doing I told them, it was hard and I was ok with that. I was ok with the fact that I would cry just thinking about the babies I left there and wondering how they were doing and I was ok being open with the people in my life about how I was really doing. What I soon learned though was that people didn’t want to hear it. People wanted to hear the good stories about the cute little babies, not that those cute little babies were born HIV + or that they were found in a pit latrine because they were literally thrown away.
So, I slowly went back to how I communicated before my summer in Uganda. I went back to answering questions with a smile and “I’m fine.” That’s what was comfortable for other people because that’s what our culture in America teaches us.
Blogs like the one I posted last week aren’t comfortable for people and so they don’t like it. People don’t like to face their weaknesses, much less let others know that we have weaknesses! I didn’t share my testimony for years because it makes people uncomfortable, but ya know what…we need to be uncomfortable. We need to learn to be honest with ourselves and with others because in our weaknesses He is made great!! When I tell my testimony God is glorified because it’s a crazy story that shows how faithful and good He is! It’s not about me. My breakdown last week isn’t about me either, it’s about a battle between Satan and God, and God triumphs! In the moments that we admit our weakness and our need for God, He gladly fights for us and gives us people to fight with us.
Why is it that we’re so afraid of being honest about our struggles?
As discussions happen about going back to America this comes back up a lot…how do we remain open about who we are and live out this life of honesty in a culture that tells us that’s wrong? How do we not let our pride get the better of us, because at least for me it’s the pride in me that makes me not want to show my weaknesses. I’m so used to being strong and independent and not needing anyone else that my pride tells me I shouldn’t admit to being weak or struggling. Just so you know, life is better when you tell pride to get lost and you’re honest about who you are. I may know how to live life strong and independently, but I no longer want to live life that way. I’m ok needing this crazy family around me and admitting that I have weaknesses, because I have a crazy amazing God that uses my weaknesses as strength in Him.
But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong. ~ 2 Corinthians 12: 9-10
It’s not about this world. We’re not of this world.
Do not love the world or anything in the world. If you love the world, love for the Father is not in you. For everything in the world- the cravings of sinful people, the lust of their eyes and their boasting about what they have and do– comes not from the Father but from the world. The world and its desires pass away, but whoever does the will of God lives forever. ~ 1 John 2:15-17
