Before this whole “Erica-and-me-staying-behind-so-her-leg-can-heal” thing happened, the LORD and I had a pretty crazy conversation. I asked Him, “LORD, what should I do about this [insert unnamed situation here]. How about this, I’ll just ask you if I should go right or left. Left represents x [insert unnamed option here]. Right represents y [insert opposite option here]. You decide, LORD. I’ll do whatever you say. Just tell me right or left.”
The LORD, being omnipotent, probably laughed. It wasn’t audible, but I’m ninety-eight percent sure that that’s what I felt. Instead of giving me what I would deem a straight answer, He just said, “Wait.” Then He said, “Get ready. You’re about to go into a season of waiting.”
For the record, I HATE waiting. HATE it.
When the whole, “Erica-and-me-staying-behind-so-her-leg-can-heal” thing happened, I thought that that’s what He’d been referring to. I even got an email from my Mama, telling me that I was in “Waiting Room” stage (ironic because I actually did read it in the hospital waiting room). I just needed to take a few more days, get my head screwed on right, and then the LORD would get us to Phnom Penh in—what I thought would be—a reasonable amount of time.
Ten days later, Erica and I are sitting across from each other at the local Mexican restaurant, sipping lemonades and blogging about all the things that the LORD’s been teaching us in this “reasonable” amount of time. (She’s the best Valentine ever, PS.)
The two of us have been spending a LOT of time together. Our regular Habla Chica sessions include copious amounts of mango and dragonfruit, chick flicks and, of course, talking about our hearts. Namely, about singleness. Namely, how much we both long for our men to show up and claim our hearts. Namely, about how we desperately want to be women worthy of good, honorable men of God, which basically means that we don’t want to waste our single days.
It’d be easy to look at the World Race and say that it’d be impossible for me to waste this time. I mean, I’m travelling the world. I’m helping people. I’m pouring my life into people and causes that the LORD values. I’m seeking Him. I’m in a constant state of brokenness of varying degrees.
But that’s the thing: I could easily waste my time. I could skate by on the actions of others. I could do the bare minimum. I could have a terrible attitude. I could choose to stay the same as I was when I came on this thing. I could say NO, when the LORD says WAIT.
In the middle of all this, I found a website called The Good Women Project. The title immediately grabbed my attention because it encompasses the conversations that Erica and I have been having. The idea of a Christian organization fully dedicated to the idea of what good, biblical women look like is—in a word—exciting. It gets my heart racing.
They have a lot of blogs written about singleness and what to do during your precious single years. One girl even wrote a list of things to do before she gets married. In a moment of giddiness, Erica and I both wrote one. On it are silly things like (for me) “learn to play poker” and “get my motorcycle license” and “take a dance class.” Then there are the more serious things, like, “pay off my student loans” and “forgive the men who hurt me / forgive myself”, and “write an honor code to live by.” And it’s not that I need to do it because my life is boring or that I just want to fill up the time between now and whenever the LORD decides the right time is for me to get married. Far from it! My life is full and beautiful and exciting and so blessed, which is why it’s the perfect time for this list.
I don’t have any time to waste, but I have all the time in the world to wait.
Happy Valentine's Day!
