I began the World Race with the idea that I was going to get a lot of time, space, and opportunity to learn how to be a better version of myself. I would become a clearer reflection of Christ by becoming the woman He has created me to be by learning and gaining all of His qualities. While this is all good and true, I’ve been approaching it all wrong.
For the last few months I have been striving after more patience, forgiveness, humility, generosity, understanding, and much more. But at the end of most days, I’m almost always frustrated with myself for having been short with a teammate or working harder for a quiet minute to myself over seeking out someone who needs extra help or just a listening ear. I feel like I keep asking God to teach me these things, but when opportunity arises for me to practice, I fall short.
This morning during church, I realized that I’ve been trying to fix myself. I been trying trying to gain all the qualities of Jesus rather than taking the time getting to know Jesus himself.
With this realization I began to cry out to the Lord to help me out of the hole that I feel like I have been digging myself into deeper and deeper with all my strivings to be and do better. As I prayed, Matthew 6:33 came to mind. It says, “Seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you”. Instead of striving after becoming this “better” version of myself, I just need to strive after Him. The more I run toward Jesus and spend time with Him, the more I will know, think, act, and look like Him.
Jesus IS patience, forgiveness, humility, generosity, and understanding. He IS love, strength, joy, power, and boldness. He IS everything I want and need, and then a whole lot more! Jesus lives in me and as I get to know Him more, who He is will start to overflow out of me.
I came on the race to let Jesus out of the box that I keep Him in. But today, He showed me I need to get out of my own box first so that He can show me all that He is able to do. I thought that I had been allowing God to make me uncomfortable, but He informed me today that He is only getting started.
