This week I’d love to share with you one of my journal entries from the past week and invite you into something I’m currently processing through.
12/24/17
Today I walked into church and ran into Alfonso (the man from the God’s Eyes clinic we were a part of a few weeks prior). I gave him a hug and asked him how he was doing and he told me that Martha, (his mother and the woman I had cared for) had passed away on Friday.
I was so surprised; it just seemed so sudden to me.
I told him I was sorry and gave him another hug. Then, the service started so I went to my seat. They announced that they would be having a service for her after church and I began to feel heaviness and my heart began to ache. During the service, I found myself constantly distracted; sitting in my chair while everything else was going on around me, and the only thing I could think about was Martha and Alfonso. As far as I know Martha was his only immediate family and I cannot imagine how hard that must be for him. He literally spent all of his time caring for his mother and watching over her and now she is gone. Sweet sweet Martha is gone.
After service Alfonso came over to me and his friend Ephraim (whom I was sitting next to) and was incredibly kind and loving as always. He then went on to tell me more of what had happened. He said that she was getting ready in the morning as usual and she was in the bathroom. After waiting for her for a while he went to check on her and found her lying on the ground and thought she had fallen asleep. He then tried to help her get up and found that she wasn’t waking up so he put her in bed and called the ambulance. They came within 15 minutes and found no pulse. He said that she didn’t seem to be in pain earlier that morning and that she didn’t call or cry for him or for help. He said that he was glad that she is in heaven with Jesus but that it was still hard.
He then asked for my contact info so that he could send me more pictures of her and said thank you again for taking care of his mother.
In the past month I have seen two people that I have met on the race pass away. In the midst of this I look to the Lord and ask, what do you have to say in the midst of this?
I knew that he had something to speak. I know he is here and this has a purpose because Jesus brings purpose to pain.
In response I heard six simple words: “Jesus laid death in its grave.”
This truth stuck with me.
Yes, death does and will sting, but the sting is not ultimate.
Jesus literally laid death in its grave, to not rise again. Death would not have the last say, the last word for those that know the Lord. Death cannot keep us in the grave, because we have life, eternal life in Christ who conquered, cheat and beat death.
This changes everything and in response lit two fires in my heart:
-To love with a fire in my bones because you never know when your last opportunity to love someone well will be.
-To live with increased urgency. To speak more boldly about the Lord because we do not know when or if we will see someone again whether its a dear friend or someone that we meet in a coffee shop.
we must take each opportunity and make the most of it because you will never get that exact moment again.
And If we have an unfailing hope to offer, why would we not share it?
If you have any questions about anything written in this blog post or want share anything with me in response to reading please feel free to email me at [email protected]
Thank you so much for taking time out of your day to read this!
