This morning, as I was listening to Mark Driscoll's podcast, "The Peasant Princess: Do Not Awaken Love," I was reminded of God's perfect love within my life.
Right now, I find myself in a "holding pattern," waiting, resting, and well–wrestling. Wrestling with the fact that even though I have a medley of interesting projects on my plate, my life is in a bit of a silent uproar.
I am not trying to say that life is miserable. It certainly is not. It is just…well, uncertain. Part of me longs to lead missional teams. Part of me longs to sit in God's presence with a notebook and pen at hand. Part of me longs do disciple friends and college students. Part of me longs to paint. Part of me longs to return to Kenya with a thousand pairs of eyeglasses. And then part of me is…well, uncertain.
So, I am in a place where life is peaceful on the outside, but the silent uproar inside me feels as though it is near its breaking point. My life is not my own, I know this, but what am I to do?
For right now, I know that I am to bask in His love. I knew this as I took a friend's 6-year old to the pool yesterday, attended and participated in a study on Hebrews, sat with friends at Fido, and prayed with a friend before bed. I knew this when I woke this morning and spoke truth into some of my friends' lives via texts and emails, as I emailed contacts all over the globe, as I worked on some webdesign for my site, and now, as I write.
So, now, I cannot help but thank God for the reminder in Mark Driscoll's sermon that:
"God's love is possessive. Once He calls you, He never leaves you. God's love is passionate. Once He calls you, He never stops loving you and He never gives up on you."
So, silent uproar or not, I know that God's perfect love is in all that I am doing. I believe this. I am choosing this. I am trying to walk in this.
And now…will you?
