I truly dislike not being a part of an activity or group of friends. It hurts my feelings when I am excluded from friends’ lives. If it were up to me, I’d have a lot more free time to spend with friends and invest in their lives, but work and responsibilities beckon and alas, I often have to miss out on celebrations, get-togethers, home parties, and whatnot. Yet, even when I am in the middle of a huge project or working in whatever capacity, my mind wanders to what my friends are doing and how I wish I could be there with them instead of fulfilling my responsibilities.
It is an immature thought, I know. I debated to write about this, but being that it is Michelle Thompson’s birthday bash tonight and I already agreed to take care of a friend’s child over-night, this topic bubbled up to the surface without hesitation.
Sitting in a quiet apartment in Cool Springs, knowing that a few dozen of my friends were having a blast and I was “stuck,” I felt miserable. I had to intentionally focus on the book I was reading for work, making sure Mikayla was enjoying life, and focus on what was at hand and not what was happening at Cafe Coco.
My thoughts wandered in at about the third chapter about my up-coming move to New Zealand. A voice inside said, “you’d better start to learn how to let go.” This was a bittersweet thought and I began to pray about learning to let go of my life here, my friends, my family, my work, and everything else that makes Nashville (and the U.S. in general) my comfort zone.
So, this is where I am at: I am learning to let go, day by day, with God’s help and comfort, for even though I know that I will be back in home Nashville in a year from now, my real home is in God.
