When I was little, whenever my mom needed something, she used to always call to me from some far away part of our house (let’s be honest she still does this) and our conversation would go a little bit like this:
Mom: HAAANNNNAAAHHH!!!
Me: Yes ma’am?
Mom: COME DOWN HERE!!!
Me: For what?
Mom: *silence*
In case you were wondering the “for what” was “because I said so” and the silence indicated that I better get downstairs or else.
When I realized that God was calling to me to go on the World race, our conversation went a little bit like this:
God: HAANNNAHH
Me: Yes, Jesus?
God: Get out of your comfort zone, go on a long term mission. Not a week, not even a month. A LONG TERM mission.
Me: But, why?
God: *silence*
On the World Race website it says that the 2nd biggest mistake people make is waiting for the call to go. I’ve read countless blogs where racers have said things like “I’ve been thinking about going on the Race for years and I never felt like it was the right time” or “I couldn’t ever hear God’s voice clearly about it.”
JJ Cummings writes in her blog, “I’m sure you are looking for that moment here where I say “I cried and I knew in that moment this is what God wanted me to do!” Yeah, nooooo. Doesn’t really work like that…I do not feel “called” in any way to the World Race, but am simply choosing the uncomfortable in order to become a better follower of Christ.”
Now, remember my conversation with God? I’d say that its pretty clear that God is “calling” me to do this. If JJ, and countless other racers, didn’t hear the call and are still going on this journey, then who am I, someone who heard the call as plain as day, to ignore God; a God who has called me to a purpose that is far greater than the life I am currently living.
CAN YOU EVEN IMAGINE if I had just ignored my mom in those times I was in trouble?? I’ll tell you this much, I wouldn’t be alive and writing to you in this moment.
Now, can you imagine if I had ignored the God of the Universe at such a time as this.
There is more than one way to “die” and when you aren’t alive in Christ, you are already dead.
I could see myself heading down a path of spiritual death. I was depressed, riddled with anxiety, so, so unhappy. I was unhappy at work and so lonely.
But God spoke so clearly when He told me that none of it mattered. At the root of my anxiety, none of it mattered.
Steven Furtick of Elevation Church led a Sermon on Psalm 139, or as he likes to call it a “Psalminar” where he says that we need to take responsibility for our own anxiety and that nothing will change until we do. He says, “Why are we anxious, when our father knows our needs?”
Pastor Furtick says, “We are staying awake worrying about something that HE already worked out.”
The Lord searched my heart, knew exactly what I needed and worked it out for my good. He knew that I needed a place to grow in community. He knew that I needed to leave my job for a time and figure out what my next steps in my career might be. He knew that I had been looking for a way to get out of my comfort zone spiritually (and in all other aspects) and take my relationship with him to the next level. And last, but DEFINITELY not least, he knew my desire to help people and help them to know that they matter to Jesus who loves them.
I am currently a manager at a department store and I’ve always been the type of manager who cares about what happens to you when you leave work, who wants you to know how much you matter. Our identities aren’t supposed to be in our work, or in our sickness, or in what other people think of us. We find our identity in Him. We are who He says we are. We are His Children. And in return, He gives us a love that never fails, never gives up, never lies, always keeps its promises.
God might have been silent for a bit after He told me this was what he wanted me to do, but He is equipping me more and more each day. Whether it be through fundraising or being able to minister to people when I tell them about this mission.
When Jesus saw Simon and Andrew and James He said “Come, follow me and I will send you out to fish for people.” Mark 1:17 They didn’t wait to understand their calling, they just went.
Without delay.
So, here I go, without delay and what I know is that my God is the God who provides. But a prayer or two from anyone reading this wouldn’t hurt. It also wouldn’t hurt if you scrolled back to the top and hit that donate button and prayerfully considered donating!
<3,
Hannah
