I was asked this morning how my Christmas was & my answer was it was different but it was good. Different, in all honesty, can be hard and frustrating. When you live in a place thousands of miles away from home no matter how hard you, or your team, or community tries it can feel so isolating. Not only are emotions all over the place during this season, but exhaustion leads to being more aware of them. It’s hard to be away from the people I love most and in this community sometimes. It’s even hard to not have all the christmas foods that I’m use to. But, I’m not entitled to comfort foods or even wifi to call people that I was missing today.
I don’t want to make my day and this post sound like a pity party, because quite truly im extravagantly blessed to live in india for this part of my life. I am blessed to share in life with a village community that a month ago was foreign to me. I’m blessed to be welcomed into church services and community events. Beyond that, I’m blessed to truly experience the weight of abandonment and dying to preferences, expectations, and entitlement. I’m blessed to go through uncomfortable months and sad seasons because it’s something I am promised that’s a precursor to the reward of eternal life with Christ.
With each conversation, country and month, I take a step deeper into abandonment; peeling back a layer of entitlement and pride. As it is stripped away, I am gifted with a more clear vision for the eternal impact of this sacrifice as well as the sweet gifts of hope and peace. I expected to receive no gifts this year, but by God’s goodness i received peace and comfort, rest and humility. So while this Christmas was so different than what I have ever experienced, it has shifted my perspective on a what i value, and how i will view the normalities of life going forward. I feel woefully more blessed because of it.
