I’m a doer. I don’t do well with slowing down and being still. At home, my days fill up pretty quick, and if they aren’t full, I’ll try my hardest to fill those moments with tasks or people or something.
This month we have an all squad month. We have been living together on a farm in Granada, Nicaragua. This place is literally beautiful. There’s tons of land to run and play. We sit on the porch and look out at the Mombacho volcano. Horses graze in the fields. Hammocks are strapped to every column available. The ladies that work in the kitchen work so hard to prepare us three great meals a day. Oh, and every once in a while, the ice cream man wheels his cart up the road and we all come running like a group of second graders.
Ministry looks different everyday. Some work on the farm watering trees and tending to the garden. A team has assembled to experiment with a moringa plant that has major health benefits. A couple of the girls have helped take care of the dogs that belong to the owner of the farm. They walk them, give them baths, etc. A group of girls found a local library that was in need of some assistance, so they clean, play with the kids, and help the librarian any way they can. There’s a large pavilion on the farm where there’s constant basketball games, clinics, and free play. Some days people visit the dump, the hospital, the nursing home, and there’s also a prison ministry.
Prayer walking is a daily activity. A group would go out in the morning and in the evening to visit with people in the community and pray with them. There are a few translators that work here at the farm. They go on the prayer walks with us to translate English to Spanish. We have met some amazing people on these walks. We’ve seen people healed, joy restored, and hope cultivated. Prayer walking was probably one of my favorite ministries. Each time we would meet new families I would just be amazed at how open and genuine they were to our visit. I would think to myself, “Why don’t we fellowship like this in America?”
So, with so much going on around me, and so many options for ministry, why am I so restless? Why do I feel trapped? Why do I feel like everyone has a skill or something to bring to the table and I don’t? I have been feeling a little sad, a little lost, and a little confused. I look around our squad and I’m amazed at how God made each of us and brought us all together. I see musicians, artists, creators, inventors, athletes, farmers, etc. Why don’t I feel like I “fit” somewhere?
As I was sitting on the porch one afternoon wrestling with these thoughts, one of my sweet friends I’ve already made on my team plops down in a chair beside me and I start sharing my thoughts with her. She immediately starts challenging me to higher thinking. AKA feedback. Beep boop. If you know, you know. I knew some of the things I’d been letting bother me were total lies from the enemy. Of course I have a place and a purpose. It just may not look like I think it’s going to look. God’s thoughts are higher than mine and His ways are higher than my ways. The truth is, I’m learning so much about myself already, and there’s things I may not even realize I am capable of yet. I don’t need to limit myself to my background knowledge or compare my strengths to someone else’s. The body of Christ is vast and each cell is unique. God created each of us to work perfectly in unison with our gifts and talents. None are better or more useful than the other. All are needed. All are important.
I’m a nurturer. I have wisdom. I have discernment. I’m maternal. I am strong. I am a thinker. I’m a doer for the Kingdom. I’m a friend. I’m an encourager. I love hard. I’m loyal. I’m a child of God. I’m a daughter of the King. I have an identity that I’m going to let my Father define.
1 Corinthians 12:4-6 says,
“There are different kinds of gifts, but the same Spirit distributes them. There are different kinds of service, but the same Lord. There are different kinds of working, but in all of them and in everyone it is the same God at work.”
If you’re reading this and you’ve wondered what on earth your “thing” or “title” is, here’s what I’ve recently discovered: the more that we search for ourselves in what others are doing and achieving, we limit what God can do with each of us individually. Let God surprise you. Let Him be God. When you find that, you find you.
