“This is modern day colonialism” I see commented under a missionaries post.
“How to escape the white savior complex” is the most suggested search after typing the word “white”
My hands shake as I quickly take to an old instagram photo I posted of a mission trip. I click “archive” as I worry what people will think
I sit in my room alone in the middle of the night conversing with God. Asking why He would call me to missions if the world would look at me this way.
I wrestle in the early morning hours, wondering if being angry at people for going on mission trips to take photos with children, force American culture, and leave is hypocritical of me.
But I go.
I raise the $16,000, I live in a tent, I sit through hours of sessions based on understanding culture, children, religions.
And then I hear a supporter tell me, “after you do that, people will love when you can post a photo of you and a little kid from Africa!”
I’m not even going to Africa.
Then my phone lights up with a generous donation and a caption that reads “go change the world”
I know her heart was in the right place, but I cannot shake the feeling of reading something like this.
Truth is, this scares me. It scares me that telling people what I’m doing makes the room fall silent with the taboo thoughts of, “she thinks shes going to go change the world by making people look exactly like her.” It scares me that I’ve seen it with my own eyes. It scares me that missions is known as teenage girls in long skirts taking photos with orphan children, posting it on their instagram, and leaving. It scares me that missions has become more about pushing western culture on people than introducing people to the Jesus that appeals to every culture and people group.
Bottom line is, God is not an American God. He didn’t send His son to die for Americans and He definitely didn’t send His son for people to become like everyone else. In fact, the very basis of Jesus’ life was turning the previous idea of the kingdom upside down. What was known as legalistic and based on rules was completely flipped on its head when Jesus walked into the room. If we believe in that Jesus defeating our sins with His blood, then we believe in that Kingdom as well. If the veil has been torn, then we believe in every people group coming before the Lord in confidence and equality, each in their own beautiful and specific way of worship. We believe that it is not about the name of God used or the way of prayer, but the relationship with this kingdom flipping, miracle working, enemy defeating Jesus. God never called us to be special and exclusive carriers of the gospel only to poor villages thousands of miles away. He never told us our culture was the right way. My heart aches for the hundreds and thousands of people hurt by a religion that is not Jesus, rather a one glorifying the beliefs of a skin color. My heart hurts when I see that religion called Christianity and missions. Missions is no more complicated than this: to unite all in Christ through the freedom of universal reconciliation and worship. God’s will and heart is that all will know Him. That all will pray and worship Him in their own heart language.
I believe every person, no matter race, social status, culture, or country is invited into the Kingdom. I believe that being with is more important than doing for. I believe that ministry is life and life is ministry. I believe in loving out of overflow, no matter where I am. I believe the mission does not change based on the country, people, or if there is a camera out. Over all this, though, I believe that the Lords love is earth shattering for every type of person. That the true, unfiltered, un-americanized gospel can change lives.
No, it’s not about posting photos of kids from Africa. It’s not about buying people things to feel better about myself. its not about white christians flying across the world to tell people about a Jesus we cannot seem to talk about in our country.
Honestly, I wish I could ask God why He would entrust such broken humans with such a valuable mission. Instead, though, I thank Him for entrusting a person like me to carry a love as captivating as this. Truth is, I am just a vessel. A messed up, broken, American vessel. I can’t do it. I can’t save a persons life and I cannot change the world. I believe God can, and I believe spending my life to be that vessel is worth it. I believe living out of a backpack, not knowing what tomorrow looks like just so one person can experience this love is absolutely worth everything I have and so much more. I believe every single person needs Jesus, American or not. I believe the world needs followers of Jesus to boldly talk of Him more than it needs people to do things for it. Christians, I invite you to ask the hard questions. Deconstruct your faith and let the Lord fill those spaces in. Seek to understand what parts of your faith are morphed with culture. In the great commission, (Matt 28:18-20) the greek word used for “all nations” is “panta teathne” meaning, “all people groups”. Meaning no longer about state lines or political boundaries, but rather all people groups. And all the sudden, the great commission becomes the great co-mission, partnering with God.
I am no different than the next christian for deciding to do missions. Missions is waking up in your room and living a life cherishing the Father by living in an overflow of this love. Once you experience that love, once you soak it in, how can you not be a missionary? How can I cherish something so beautiful and captivating and keep it to myself? Missions is walking with someone and discovering these new and beautiful depths of Christ with them, not offering a product that will lose it’s newness. Thank goodness I am not an American missionary, and neither are you. Thank goodness the gates of heaven are not locked based on how far you travel. Thank goodness I am a Kingdom missionary.
Im so thankful for a Jesus so sweet to show us how its supposed to be done. Im so thankful for a Holy Spirit to lead us and move us how He needs us. Im so thankful for a God so patient when I mess up in His message. Thank GOODNESS all I have to do is listen to where He wants me, open my mouth, and He does the rest. (Ephesians 3:16, Romans 8:11, Acts 2:3-4)
Jesus showed us exactly how to share this love countless times in the Bible. He was intentional, he was informal, appealing, conversational, and loving. He dialogued not in a way only according to His culture, but He loved and learned about new cultures. He spent the first 30 years of His life studying culture, intentionality, and people. He did not keep it to Himself. He intentionally passed through Samaria to talk to one woman who had never experienced His love. (John 4) What if we approached missions like this? What if we approached life like this? He engaged in conversation and presented people with truth in languages they’d understand. What was seen as lowly, He saw as lovely. He welcomed people and the questions that came with them with open arms. He did not pass through towns, give people things and leave. He loved fiercely, incredibly, and beautifully everywhere we went. That is a Christian. That is a missionary.
How kingdom shaking would it be if we began to live how we were called to, sharing this hope along the way? How heaven shattering would it be if we began to share the gospel instead of a boxed in, human-sized, western God?
So, maybe the search bar will always suggest “what is white saviorism”, and maybe twitter will always call me names for this life. But, I am honored to be given this name, this responsibility, this love for people, and I think you should be too.
