Since being here I have fallen in love with this country. Just the thought of leaving here makes me want to cry. There are a lot of things that I’m going to miss about this country when I leave.
-I’m going to miss packed chicken bus rides were you can’t move.
-I’m going to miss Wendy our amazing ministry host that loves us so well.
-I’m going to miss my 2 best friends, Luis and Nydeli, and all the laughter they brought to my
life.
-I’m going to miss Shoreline, the church I attend every week here in Guatemala.
-I’m going to miss Josephina, our ministry host mom who takes care of us and loves us so well
-I’m going to miss the empanada lady who comes on our bus and sells empanadas for 13 cents
-I’m going to miss the AIM staff here in Guatemala who constantly are pouring into us
-I’m going to miss Bola De Oro, the village we have worked in the past 3 months
The list of things I am going to miss about Guatemala could go on forever. While there are so many things I am going to miss about this beautiful country, there is one person I won’t miss. I won’t miss the girl who arrived in Guatemala full of bitterness and unforgiveness. The girl who felt entitled do what she wanted when she wanted. The girl who felt like she needed to control everything and every situation. The girl who was so scared of judgement from others that she wasn’t herself.
I won’t miss the person I was when I arrived here in Guatemala. When I got off the plane I was carrying much more than my 50 pound pack my back. I was carrying the weight of the identity I held onto for years. I was holding onto who the world said I am instead of who the Lord said I am. I was a slave to the things I held onto.
Galations 5:1 says , “It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by the yoke of slavery”
When I accepted Christ into my life I became free. But I didn’t live in that freedom. I was still a slave to the things I held onto because I wasn’t willing to give them to the Lord. Honestly, I was scared to give everything over to the Lord. I was comfortable with who I was and where I was at and didn’t want to change. But when I came on the race The Lord told me I wasn’t living up to my full potential and I couldn’t until I gave up the things I was holding onto.
The last 3 months has been a time of retraining the way I think. I am learning what it is like to have a kingdom mindset. To get rid of the things the world has says about me and to believe the things the Lord says about me. A kingdom mindset is one that forgives and loves unconditionally. It’s one that does not feel entitled and fears no judgement.
There is a new girl who is getting on the plane to leave Guatemala tomorrow. A girl who is walking in freedom and has joy in her spirit. A girl who is not afraid to be herself because she was created flawlessly in the image of the Father. A girl who has let go of her need for control and her need to know whats going to happen in the future.
