I have a confession to make.
Even though I was warned several times at training camp to abandon all expectations of what the World Race would be like I still left the states with some (what I felt to be) harmless expectations.
I expected to fall in love with certain countries.
Haiti was at the top if that list.
My expectation of falling in love with Haiti was born out of obligation.
Justin went to Haiti two years ago right after the earthquake.
He came home changed by what he saw and experienced. He fell in love with the people of Haiti. He made it very clear he wanted to live there.
I left on the World Race with the obligation to fall in love with Haiti just like Justin.
Since my husband loved it so much I needed to love it too so that we could live out his desire to live in Haiti.
This month we are in Haiti.
So far, my expectation has been shattered.
Haiti has not romanced me like it did Justin.
I haven’t fallen in love with the country, people, or culture.
At first, I felt guilty but then I shed that guilt for the fact that even though I’m not ready to pack up and make Haiti my home I’m here for a reason.
When you form expectations you get busy trying to fulfill those expectations and miss what God really has for you.
Expectations also put God in a box.
When you expect him to do something or try to predict his plans you miss what He is really doing.
I expected to fall in love with Haiti, Justin and I move here, and be missionaries for the rest of our lives.
I missed that just as easily Justin could have fallen in love with Haiti so we picked the route we did to be put with amazing people who stretch is in incredible ways and return to Haiti with them and learn things that equip us for the next season in our lives.
And even still that might not be the reason we are here!
But since I have abandoned my expectations of what this month should look like I’m open to whatever the reason we are here might be.
Life is full of expectations.
But life is lived full when they are left behind.
