JUMP

My hair blows in the wind as my heart continues to swell with expectant joy. I reflect on the last eight months and revel at the beauty and the disaster that my life was before I started this journey. It was more disaster than beauty. As I sit here and think back to who I was eight months ago-captive, chained, insecure, and broken-my heart feels like it has wings as I embark on this last leg of the race. I’m in Africa, a place I’ve dreamed about for years. I can’t help but notice how good my God is. How He’s broken me down, humbled me, restored me, broken the chains off of me, loved me, and given me pure freedom through this wild ADVENTURE. And here in Africa, rainbow nation, I remember His promises and I’m ready for the next step. This life with Him is an adventure, a crazy one at that, and I’m settling for nothing less than the adventure He’s promised me.

I used to think God was just there, my faith was stagnant-I believed the story but I didn’t believe He cared. I would be lying to you if I said the same thing now. I’ve experienced the love of my Savior, I’ve experienced His provision & grace, I’ve seen His healing hand touch and heal sick bodies, and He’s given me a chance to see how He’s working in the world through His obedient children.

I have found freedom. God has brought me to the edge. He’s brought me to the edge of this cliff that He’s been leading me to my whole life. I look out and I see the crystal clear water. It’s shining like a million diamonds and swaying back and forth in the warm breeze. I can feel the rock and dirt as my feet grip the earth below me. My arms opened wide ready to embrace my Father-I breathe in, deep and long. The salty air fills my lungs and the sun kisses my closed eyelids. I’m going to jump. I’ve brought you here…THREE
You are safe with me…TWO
Jump into the unknown, jump into the freedom…ONE

GO!!

A smile dashes across my face as my feet leave the earth behind me-my hair whips around my face and tears of joy stream from my eyes. My heart is exploding in my chest as butterflies play tag in my stomach. And then it hits me, feet first the water kisses my toes. It’s colder than it looks and it makes me feel alive-it feels as if I’ve gone into slow motion as I feel the clear water wrap around my ankles up to my calves and towards my hips. The water cuddles around my waist and multiplies the butterflies. My chest contracts as the coldness grips me until I’m fully submerged, holding my breath. It seems as though time has stopped. I’m under the water, I listen as my ears hear the muffled sound of the ocean waves. I’m in a place of pure serenity. I’m under water, but I can fully breathe. My soul is still.

I am free.

My head emerges from the water, my body sways as I float weightlessly on the waves. My mind finally catches up and laughter erupts from somewhere deep inside of me. I feel the love of my Daddy crash over me & the only thing I can think about is how I have to jump again.

I’ve never felt so alive in my life. I’ve never felt so free in my life. I’ve jumped, I’ve taken that leap of faith and there’s no chance to turn back-I’m flying through the air, fully expecting my Father to catch me.

He’s never failed me yet.

My precious girl, Thandeka.