I’ll have to admit, there are moments on the Race that I have a passing thought about going home or question what I’m doing.
Just this week I had a moment where I was like “Wow! I only have 7 months left!” but in the same thought “Man! I STILL have 7 months left?!”
The Race is a whirlwind of ministry, personal growth, tough times, getting away from comfort, different foods, being constantly around people, doing some amazing things for the Kingdom and so much more.
But the Race is just like usual life in that there are hard moments AND good, blessed moments.
This past week was a hard week for me. We only did only a couple hours of ministry a day (which was evangelizing to university students), I was overwhelmed with change (I actually don’t mind change, but in reality it takes me a while to get my “sealegs”), and I was getting used to a new team, country, ministry, and position, and I was overwhelmed with some things I was and am currently processing.
I just felt stuck and overwhelmed. And a small part of me just wanted to go home-back to safety and comfort.
However, there was a moment where I also became increasingly aware of how much time I actually have though. I thought of my squad and how quickly the past 4 months have gone and that I only have 7 months left with them. These people I have lived life with, worshipped and prayed with, struggled with, served with. At the end of the Race, I have to say goodbye to my family .
I also know that grass is not greener on the other side. A year ago I just couldn’t wait to be out of the country getting my hands dirty with working in people’s lives. I don’t want to wish away the time, even if things are not easy or even if I’m not doing “glamorous” ministry. I know if I was back in the US, I would be dreaming of being here.
I don’t want to take the next 7 months for granted. They are precious for me to grow. To love on people and to minister. To do mission work–which is what I’ve wanted to do for years desperately. And to build more relationships with my wonderful church, family, and squad.
I want to bloom where I am planted.
