Since being home from the race, I’ve been reading through the works of C.S. Lewis. Even with the multitude of authors I admire, not one causes me to question just about every dimension of the way I communicate with God, the way Lewis does. His works challenge me to think of Him as even more powerful, more able. To come before Him boldly with an increased expectancy. To eradicate any doubts about His willingness or ability to do big things in my life.
Of the many underlined and dog-eared pages I’ve collected, there’s one excerpt in particular that I find myself going back to:
“It would seem that Our Lord finds our desires not too strong, but too weak. We are half-hearted creatures, fooling about with drink and sex and ambition when infinite joy is offered us, like an ignorant child who wants to go on making mud pies in a slum because he cannot imagine what is meant by the offer of a holiday at the sea. We are far too easily pleased.”
I don’t think that God is looking exclusively for extraordinary people. Just laid-down lovers of Jesus, obedient to do what He asks with enough humility and transparency to not take the glory for themselves.
The great, mighty things done throughout the bible weren’t carried out solely by the exceptionally gifted. God continually chooses to use the ones that failed Him, that turned away, that weren’t qualified by the world. He chose to use the ones that, upon saying yes to Him; would have the ability to give all the glory to God.
I’ve been disheartened the last three months as I feel less and less qualified to do big, exciting things for the Kingdom. I’m not so good at what the world deems “enough” or “qualified”. But the closer I lean into Jesus and hear what He has to say about me, I’ve come face-to-face with the reality that what the world values has very little to do with what He does.
I think God is ready and waiting to perform countless miracles through those of us willing to ask. Those He deems qualified. I think He’s excited about it.
I doubt any of the great men in the bible expected to be great. They didn’t necessarily ask for signs and wonders. More often than not, they were too busy with their own measure of sin to stop and ask God to perform a miracle through them.
Consider the ark, the big fish, the burning bush, the lions den, the walking on water. Miraculous deeds performed by ordinary people at the hand of God. All of which glorified Him. They were likely the last people society would’ve chosen, but God did. And when I think about that, I get excited. I get excited because those things were done through men who didn’t even ask! This sets an unfathomably high bar for what is possible when we do.
No, God doesn’t need us to… But what I’m beginning to learn (with a little help from my pal, Lewis) is that deep-down, I think He wants us to ask.
