The sun beams down on us as we drive away from the orphanage, the red dust of the roads billows up behind the Tuk Tuk and passing motor bikes. The sound of children laughing and squealing fills the air. I watch the kids wave to us until we are completely out of sight.
Cows are scattered throughout the fields as we drive past, the breeze as I stare out at the countryside.
Im trying not to think about what is coming at the end of this week.. another country, another ministry, another heartbreak.
This was our last time to spend time with the children at BCI Orphanage and it was probably one of my hardest goodbyes yet.
My first time to the orphanage was last week when we started going to just spend time with them. Immediately I fell in love with the children that ran up to the Tuk Tuk as we got out. They immediately surrounded us with hugs, high-fives, smiles and laughter. We spent the next 3 hours playing games, soccer, singing silly songs, and just being with them.
This time was a little bit different, we still played games but than Pastor Sara did a bible study with them, and shared a little bit about Jesus’s life and how He loves us so incredibly much. As they stood up to pray I could feel the lump in my throat growing bigger as I listened to them repeat a prayer after Pastor. I watched them with their heads bowed and hands pressed together tightly and I thought my heart was going to explode. I loved these children so incredibly much and I had just been with them for a short time, the love that I have for them doesn’t even compare to the love that Jesus has for them.
As they finished Pastor explained to them that this was our last time to see them and that we were moving on to another country, as they all turned around to look at the three of us sitting in the back I could see the confusion in their eyes, I saw the hurt and the sadness that passed like a wave over them.
My heart broke.
With tears on the verge of spilling out we all got up to say some words to them.
I can remember standing up there and looking out on them and feeling nothing but an overwhelming love.
I told them that even with the short time that I was able to spend with them that I loved them so incredibly much, and that if I loved them this much how much more Jesus loved them.
I told them how much joy and love they had and that I would think about them everyday.
This one boy who had to be at least 8 or 9 would not leave my side the rest of the time that we were with them, every chance he would get he would wrap his arms around my waist and just hug me.
My heart was breaking.
I hated that we had to leave and that we couldn’t promise them that we would be back to see them.
How much I wish I could tell them that I would see them again, that I would be able to see them this Saturday and Sunday and that I wouldn’t have to leave them.
Even though I may not see these children again I was shown again how much our Father really truly loves us. My heart was bursting at its seems with love for these children, How much more love does the Father have for us?
As we left I hoped that I showed them the love that they deserved, I hoped that they would know the love of Jesus through my actions and my words. That even though I had to go Jesus will never leave them, and He will pour out His love on them daily.
Coming into Cambodia I wanted to give it my all, I wanted to push in to every aspect of the ministry and not hold back.
I have fallen in love with this amazing country and the people that I am surrounded by.
I have truly left a piece of my heart in this wonderful country and as cheesy as it is I don’t want that piece back.
Thank you Lord for this extraordinary, ordinary life and the love that you show me through it!
Love,
Hanna
