As I’m about to transition back home for the last and final time. I have just a few days left, 3 days to be exact. Knowing that my race, the 13 months I’ve spent on the field is coming to end, I’m feeling pretty much the same as I did at the end of my race. But this time I have a bit of a different perspective and maybe a few less tears. At the end of my race, I was asked the question “am I excepting that God is calling me Home?”. I honestly said no because come to find out, it wasn’t my time to go home yet. The Lord has used this 2 months back out on the field to show and teach me a lot. More than I even thought! What I’ve learned mostly revolves around how much I care about the people he has placed in my life. In this short time, He gave me the following insight.
The first is that He is the ultimate protector. That no matter what I go thru, no matter what my family goes thru, no matter what anyone that I deeply care for and love goes thru, He has got them. Though I felt it was my job for so long, I can’t protect them anymore. They were actually never mine to protect.
The second insight that I have learned is that I will never care as much as God cares for those placed in my life. I can love my heart out on them. My heart can hurt so much when those around me are hurting, but it will never hurt as much as His heart will hurt for them. I care but He cares more.
And lastly, that I need to let it go, and know that I can’t fix the issues and struggles that those around me are walking thru. The Lord has allowed me to be there to listen and pray. But this is what I can do. If I’m not with them in there struggles the best thing I can do is pray and intercessd for them. It doesn’t matter where the Lord takes me in this world, whether states apart or oceans, this truth holds true.
So during my time out on the field again, I have learned these things. And as I’m only a few days away from home, I ask myself the same question, “Am I excepting of the fact that God has now called me to go home?” And the answer is yes!!!!
Please keep me in your prayers as I begin to see what life off the field looks like. For me to take all that God has taught me in the past year and put into life at home. It’s seems like a daunting challenge but with Him I know I can do it. This will probably be my last blog. So thank you for your support and your willingness to be apart of my journey thru this blog. I also only need $152 towards my fundraising goal. Please consider donating to get me to the end!
Much Love,
Haley
