This morning, my team and I spent 3 hours praying, reading, and meditating. It was so evident that the Lord was in the room this morning.
A couple days ago, one of my squad mates gave me the words “boxing match.” I lied and told him I didn’t know what that was supposed to mean (sorry Austin), but I did know. So often I find my head and heart in a boxing match—battling my thoughts of comparison, feelings of being inadequate, and wrestling with the walls I build up inside of me. This morning I was reminded that our battle is not against flesh and blood. It’s not against my friends or myself. The enemy can’t take what I have or change who I am.
Despite all that, this morning I was just feeling an overwhelming amount of thankfulness about so much that’s been happening over the last 3 weeks. Thankful for his grace and patience. Thankful that the Lord meets me right where I am. Thankful for this life. Thankful for my walls (slowly) breaking down. Thankful for freedom—the taste of freedom that is found in complete vulnerability. Thankful that He lost His life so I could find mine here. Thankful for raw and real community that sits with me in the pain and the struggle and the hurt and the confusion—who stands up for me and with me, fights for me and with me, who allows me to feel what I’m feeling but reminds me not to dwell in it, who points me higher, who teaches me things about myself that I didn’t even know, who helps me discover more of who God is. I’m literally so thankful for my team because they are all these things to me.
This is the Kingdom. The Kingdom is right here, right now. This is the Father’s heart.
With love,
Hals
