I thought I knew what a broken heart was. Then I came on the Race.
This realization began last week when Maureen, our ministry host, asked if a couple of us wanted to go to PGN (Guatemala’s Social Service) to meet a 9 year old boy that would potentially live at the orphanage.
We walked into the waiting room and sitting quietly on a chair playing with a toy truck was Jose. When he saw us, an infectious smile immediately spread across his face. As Spanish dialogue was being exchanged between the adults in the room about Jose, those of us that couldn’t understand had our own conversation with him through smiles and laughter. And it was one of the most uplifting conversations I’ve ever had. A conversation that didn’t need words.
We didn’t stay long: 5, maybe 10 minutes. Once we got back into the car, Maureen briefed us on Jose’s story and circumstances. That morning, PGN had found Jose in a pig sty, with no clothes on. Apparently, he spent a majority of his time at home naked in a pig sty to go to the bathroom so nobody had to spend money on diapers or time on changing him. He’d simply be hosed down at the end of the day with the pigs and brought inside to sleep under the staircase. Full on Harry Potter style.
As I did, you probably need time to process a 9 year old boy actually living in these circumstances; I’ll give you a second.
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Heartbreaking, right? I’ve heard stories of children and people being in circumstances like these but to meet such an innocent and happy boy and think that earlier that day he was living with the pigs? It’s hard, impossible actually, to justify.
And I was feeling emotions that took me the rest of the day to grapple with. I felt sick to my stomach. What circumstances does one have to be in to think that’s the best option for a little boy? HOW could somebody treat their child like that? Why are there people in the world that are so desperate that they need to resort to putting their child in a pig sty? How does a child in this situation find any joy?
Now, the old me would have asked “God, how could you let this happen?” But the me filled with the Holy Spirit spent the day not yelling at God but crying with Him. I’ve coped with a broken heart; but for the first time, I was coping with HIS broken heart. His heart is SO much more broken than mine has ever been. And I came across these realizations:
My broken heart aches for my pain. His broken heart aches for the pain of His children.
My broken heart perseveres to heal itself. His broken heart perseveres to heal our hearts.
My broken heart heals with the passing of time. His broken heart heals with redemption.
After meeting Jose, I ached, persevered then God redeemed.
Yes, this story has a happy ending!
After hearing Jose’s story, Maureen asked us if they should take Jose in. She had two hours to make this life changing decision. Based on the very little knowledge or experience we have with kids with disabilities or running an orphanage, we obviously said YES. How could you not?
Two hours later, Jose ran into my arms, two balloons in his hand, crossing the threshold of his new home.
God redeemed this story and healed His broken heart. Jose now spends his days laughing endlessly with other kids, learning about Jesus for the first time and constantly being loved on with hugs, kisses and words of affirmation. Jose’s mom is able to visit her son without having to worry about taking care of him the best way she knows how. And just as I’m doing here in Guatemala, God is beaming with joy at the redemption in Jose’s story.
Jose is just one of 23 kids at Los Gosozos that has a story that has broken God’s heart. And I know there are so many more children around the world in these circumstances. So while I ask you to pray for Jose and his mom as they undergo this transition, and the other beautiful children at the orphanage, I encourage you to open your heart wider than your own. Open your heart to what breaks His. Despite how much more painful it is, the redemption God provides is worth every broken heart.
It’s only month one, man. Bring on the next 10.
But He said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. – 1 Corinthians 2:19
