Sometimes praying prayers is scary to me. It shouldn’t be, however when I pray sometimes, I get scared. I’m scared that God is going to take away something in my life, scared He is going to ask me to do something crazy, scared that He might answer my prayers or not answer my prayers. Sometimes I think, if I don’t pray for big things, than none of this will be asked of me or happen to me, I can stay in my own little comfortable world that I can manage all by myself.
WHAT KIND OF LIFE IS THAT?!?
I just recently finished reading “Forgotten God” by Francis Chan, and boy did that rock my stinkin’ world. If I am living a life that is manageable on my own, HOW AM I GIVING GOD THE GLORY? Short answer: I’M NOT. Here is one of my favorite quotes from this book…
“I don’t want my life to be explainable without the Holy Spirit. I want people to look at my life and know that I couldn’t be doing this by my own power. I want to live in such a way that I am desperate for Him to come through. That if He doesn’t come through, I am screwed.” – Francis Chan (Forgotten God)
I started praying this same thing for my life, that people would look at my life and think there is no way Haley can be doing what she’s doing without a good God, who is so powerful and mighty and loving to His children. Not gonna lie though, praying this scared me.
In the world that we live in, living comfortably is the goal. It’s the American Dream to have enough money to buy exactly what you need and some of what you want, to live in a house with A/C and heat, to go to church on Sundays to “get right,” to make good friends, and maybe to even serve the Lord, but that’s just a part of life, nothing too radical. This is NOT what God calls us to do. God wants us to give our whole lives to Him, not just part, to take up our cross daily, to pray HUGE, MASSIVE prayers, so that when he answers them, He is given the glory, not us.
I prayed and asked God what he wanted me to do next in life…His response: The World Race. I fought this idea for awhile, I have not been excited about it because I know it’s not something I can do on my own. I can’t “manage” this on my own. I have to rely completely on God.
I don’t have the Bible memorized, I’m not full of knowledge with sermons and lessons just to teach anyone, I don’t know any other languages, so I can’t directly communicate in all the countries.
Instead, I know English, know some Bible stories, and that’s about it.
God’s answer: I will provide.
I don’t have $16,000 + gear + spending money just sitting in my back pocket or in my savings account, nor will I make this much before I leave.
Instead, I have credit card debt, student loans, and bills to pay.
God’s answer: I will provide.
In Romans, Paul writes about Abraham’s faith. It says…
“Yet he did not waver through unbelief regarding the promise of God, but was strengthened in his faith and gave glory to God, being fully persuaded that God had power to do what he had promised.” Romans 4:20-21
I pray for Abraham’s faith for myself, that I will not waver in my beliefs and in my calling knowing that God is going to provide if it is in His plan. I pray that people look at my life and see God and give Him the glory because the Holy Spirit is so apparent. I want to pray without fear because I know I serve a massive, almighty, merciful, loving God who has a plan for me and will ALWAYS come through.
I ask that whoever is reading this helps me along this journey by praying the same for my life, and hopefully pray the same for your life. God wants to use us, we just have to let Him.
As far as the World Race, I have about $6,000 raised, meaning I need $10,000 more plus money for gear, shots, spending money on the Race. I do not doubt that the Lord will provide what I need, and I believe He will use everyone around me to do so. I ask that you pray about giving financially. Any amount helps, and it is so easy to give, just click Support Me at the top of my blog. Thank yall for taking the time to read this, and God bless you!
