I have four months left on the race, did you hear that? FOUR MONTHS! Where the time has gone, I couldn’t tell you. What I can tell you is that there are days I still wake up thinking “what the heck am I doing?” Now that I am on the downhill of this race I have taken some time to reflect on all the places I’ve been, things I’ve seen and experiences I’ve had.
The Lord has taken me to some pretty incredible places that I may have never gone to had I not said yes to the race. I have been to three continents in six months and have seen some of the most beautiful landscapes I’ve ever seen in my life. I have befriended refugees from the middle east, found two little brothers in Lesotho, and as a squad, we have been some of the first Americans to live in a small city in the Philippines. I have seen one of the seven natural wonders of the world, swam with sharks, and been on a safari in one of the most well-known national parks in the world. I’ve also met some amazing friends that I continue to be in contact with all over the world.
Though these seven months have been filled with these amazing things, it hasn’t been all rainbows and butterflies, although the pictures may look like it. What the pictures don’t show are the tears shed in the moments of insecurity, not feeling like you are enough or have anything left to give. They don’t show the reactions to life when it becomes uncomfortable, when you don’t have a bed to sleep on or you have to use a squatty-potty for the first time. They don’t show how hard it is to say goodbye to teammates when teams change. The pictures don’t show the growth that has happened in those uncomfortable moments. I am not the person I was when I left home seven months ago and I won’t be the same person I am now when I come home in four.
I am learning that wherever you are, there you are. Your baggage, insecurities, joy, it all follows you. What do you want to continue to take with you where you go and what do you need to work on and give up to God? I’m learning that if I don’t forgive someone that I am the one it ends up hurting in the end. If I have a bad attitude towards a certain person or situation, if I don’t get to the root of why, those feelings will always follow me. Remove the face of a person that rubs you the wrong way, what is it that bothers you about them? Because there ill always be another Joe Shmoe in your life that gives you the exact same feeling.
I’m still not there, but I am a work in progress and I am so thankful that I am not the person I was seven months ago and that I never have to be that person again. God is just so good and I want my life to reflect how He continues to show up. I want to live like grace has changed my life, because in reality nothing else matters. So here’s to the next four months of the race, this season of learning what it looks like to live life in radical ways.
Loves. Stay Salty.
