Homesickness is a very real thing. My first experience with true homesickness happened in the Dominican Republic during debrief, right before I went to Haiti. I felt miserable – It had only been one month since leaving home, and feelings of hopelessness set in as I thought about the eight months I had (have) to go through in order to hug my sweet sisters, hang out with my brothers, and take my parents to my favorite coffee shop. I couldn’t get through that! I wanted to go home right then! After talking to a sweet teammate about it for a while, I was able to remember that I was chosen to be here, and I can do this.
I haven’t felt homesickness since then, but last month, I began to ask God what home looked like for me right now, while away from Lakeland. I am a homebody, and while I love travel, I love being at home just as much. In Haiti, I began to wonder if I would feel at home at any point during this trip. I asked Abba to show me what home is like right now.
This month in Botswana, I am living in a log cabin. It is fully furnished with a couch and air conditioning and a washing machine and sometimes, hot water for showers. I very quickly knew that this would not help being homesick. Simple things happen and make me wish I were at home in Florida – the washing machine plays the same little song when the clothes are finished, I cook the same breakfast every morning as I have at home, and I even have a bedroom I am sharing with two friends.
So I began asking my Abba to show me what home looked like once again.
A few days ago, I went to the school near where we are living and sat in on their chapel service. The speaker talked about coming home to Jesus, and about what it looks like to go home to Him.
That same day, my team did Journey Markers, a weekly bible study the World Race creates for us. We asked ourselves what stronghold the devil has on our life, and what Jesus wants to do about it.
Jesus quickly revealed to me that I’m not letting Him be my home. Instead, I have held onto the idea of going to my home in six and a half months.
Abba doesn’t want me to wait six and a half months until I finally feel at home, He wants to be my home now, wherever I am. I don’t have to be in one tiny corner of the world to feel at home – if I let Jesus into all aspects of my life, He can and will become my shelter, my safe place, and my home.
He is good. He is faithful. He is my home.
