Hello everybody! It has been a long time since my last blog due to many reasons, one being experiencing a dry season. For the past month, I went through a time where I felt very removed from the Lord. I felt like I lost my desire to talk to him or spend any time reading His word and during the times that I did, I was feeling nothing. My days weren’t bad by any means; however, I felt like I was just going through the motions and there was a sense of emptiness in me. It was very difficult going through this time because I am very aware of how it feels to be in communication with the Lord and I was missing out on the joy and comfort that communication brought me. I strongly desired for the Lord to refuel me with a fire for Him, so that is what I prayed for and I was answered. One night at my church, Bethel’s School of Ministry came. My sister and I went and some amazing things happened. That was just the start to the end of my dry season. Then, starting this past Sunday, my church was having a four day conference, the last night consisting of just worship. The first three days were wonderful and encouraging, but the last night of worship just really amplified everything. Although each worship song eventually came to an end, my tears did not. As I sang, I could feel the Lord’s presence so strongly. The atmosphere was completely filled with the spirit of the Lord. There was one woman in the room that was just crying out to the Lord. It was very obvious that she was treading in some dark waters and needed the Lord’s strength. There was a moment when the worship leader stopped singing and spoke directly to her, stating that she was like fireworks in the room and her hunger for the Lord was so evident. At that moment, he began prophesying over her, proclaiming that the Lord was going to break her chains of abuse and abandonment. She began to cry out “Thank you, Lord” over and over and over again. It was truly a beautiful thing to witness. The whole process was beautiful, but what truly spoke to me was the woman’s response, after she received those words from the worship leader. “Thank you, Lord.” She could have responded out of anger and confusion, thinking, “Well God it’s about time you noticed me” or “Really God, you have been witnessing my pain for this long, yet you allowed this to happen to me and didn’t do anything about it until now?” Those responses would have been easy, but instead the woman responded with gratitude and thankfulness. Yes, the Lord saw her pain but he allowed her to go through it so that His strength could be revealed. He allowed it to happen so that this woman would realize her need for dependence on Him. He hadn’t ignored her. He was just working on his own schedule, and time and time again I see that His schedule is always the best schedule. How much more peace would we receive if we had the same attitude as that woman did…experiencing the trials of life but thanking God in the midst of them. Wow. That’s the attitude I should have had when I was going through my dry season. I should have said “Thank you Lord for using this season as a time of growth for me and for the blessings that I can’t yet see.” Instead, I was holding everything in and continuously asking myself “Why isn’t God talking to me? Why is He gone all of a sudden?” So many of us, including myself, are so quick to make judgements about God, thinking that He is overlooking our pain and is failing to give us any sort of comfort. However, God is always working on our behalf. It may not be obvious to us, but it’s important that we remember that God sees the big picture and we do not. Let’s all strive to be a little more thankful for how God moves in the midst of our pain and uses it for His glory and a little bit slower to anger and confusion.
