If we're facebook friends, you are probably wondering what exactly it is I do in Spain other than eat delicious pastries and drink varying qualities of coffee.
It's true… in Spain I find that I tend to drink coffee and tea until it's time to drink wine and then switch back to tea til bed. I have probably been constantly dehydrated the whole time I've been here. But what is going on behind the scenes, and under the surface, is immense change. Some days it feels like a glacial pace and others like an earthquake–a rapid shift towards looking more like Christ and in that being more of myself.
God is doing big things and good things here with me in Spain. I am learning how to be a servant leader. I am learning how to love people well even when it's hard.
One example: My roomie and I got off to a bit of a rough stuff. For me, at least, it was stupid stuff that the enemy used to try and divide and conquer. But I said sorry and she forgave me.
And I asked the class to pray for her, which touched her and broke down more walls than I could have imagined–just by being faithful to the Spirit's whisper to ask for prayer and to pray in boldness for her. She's probably the first roommate (other than the awesome one I had when I first got to G42, and excluding WR and such) that I actually talk to on a regular basis about real things. I care for her and she cares for me and it is a huge blessing to know her and be known. I could have let the little things set me on a path of bitterness and hurt, but instead I dealt with them and now we are closer than ever.
I am being refined and remodeled to look more like Christ. I am surrounded by people who are committed to pressing in to all that God has for them and that pushes me to press in. I am dreaming big but focusing on the small, knowing loving a person in the moment counts more than all my big ol' dreams to still come. I want to be a person who is known for how well she loves and cares, not for what she knows. This is hard for me because my identity has been entangled in my smarts for many years now. But people care more about how you care for them and knowing they are loved than how smart you are or how quick your wit is or how many facts you know. I know that's a part of me too but it is finding the balance between where the challenge lies. Or perhaps the fullness of both. We were challenged at worship last week to look for and ask for and live in the FULLNESS as opposed to finding balance.
FULLNESS… what does that mean? Not sure. stay tuned….
So the net result is I am learning and growing and becoming more and more like Christ. I am being equipped to live out my kingdom calling and make my dreams a reality. I am loving people and letting myself be loved.
