I had never met them. None of us had. Yet we were all honored guests at their wedding.
The parents of the groom were on the board of directors for the children’s home we served with in January. Donald, their son – the groom, was intimately involved in the children’s home. They saw us as family, through the blood of Christ, bondservants in Christ together. Five of our teams and our squad leaders were invited to the marriage ceremony and wedding feast. During the two-hour service (three if you include the hour waiting for the bridal procession to begin), two pastors shared a message, the couple shared their personal testimonies, and “sponsors” of the couple participated in traditional Filipino wedding rituals like tying cords and veil covering after the couple read their own vows. The reception was a feast to behold – the best meal (an entire pig with head and skin) and dancing.
I couldn’t help but think of the parallels the Bible speaks of – our Bridegroom, Jesus Christ, returning for His bride, the church. (Rev. 19:7-9)
A couple days later, I listened to a Tim Keller sermon, The First Wedding Day (check it out!). Keller points out that the Bible begins with a marriage (Adam and Eve), and ends with a marriage with the wedding supper of the Lamb. Here are a few “ah ha” snippets:
- “Marriage is designed to bring you into confrontation with yourself – your sin.” [For those of us not married, God will sharpen and refine us in a different way, through community and our brothers and sisters in Christ (welcome to community living on the World Race!) We must trust that God knows the best way to refine us whether it is marriage or community.]
- “I [Jesus] am the Bridegroom, you are the Bride.
- You need to have God in your life not just as the one you believe in but as your spouse.”
- “He [Jesus] loves us to make us lovely – for our sake, not His!”
- “By the wedding ring of faith, we become free from all sin and fear of death.”
- (we can look at our spouse, or our brothers and sisters in Christ, or any human for that matter and say…) “You wronged me! But Jesus Christ my great spouse, I wronged him and He loved me enough that he kept covering me and kept forgiving me.”
- “The Great Wedding Day awaits you!”
hmm… just like we waited and waited for the bride to appear in the Philippines.
My mentor, Ms. Kathy, told me that when she and her husband got married, they said “there is no back door. Divorce isn’t an option.” What if we took that stance with God? What if we make the commitment – no back door, no stepping back, what is mine is yours and yours is mine (Keller also covers this in the sermon, if you think about it, we get a really good deal: Christ gives us His grace and love!)? What if we put on the wedding band of faith and say there is no back door – no matter the circumstances that come and rage war against our souls, challenge our very existence and purpose, I’m committed to You and I’ve surrendered my life to You? I love that even when we want to back out of the deal – Christ is the perfect Bridegroom, He will never leave us or forsake us. He never lets go.
I’m learning that marriage – and community – isn’t about making us happy; it is about making us holy. It is a further refining to make us more like the reflection of Christ, our true bridegroom.
Just a few short days later, all our teams arrived at the KIM (Kids International Ministries) headquarters in Manila. There, I encountered another bride.
The walls of the YunJin Ministry Center echo of a couple who got it – they got that marriage wasn’t about happiness, but holiness. They got that their lives aren’t their own. They had been married 20 days when a car accident took the young bride, YunJin, from her earthly husband to heaven. The groom donated the insurance money from the accident to build an incredible children’s home so “that all who enter will experience the saving and transforming love of Jesus Christ.” (see the picture below for the full story that hangs on the wall of the home.)
May we count the cost, consider the weight, and slip on the wedding band of faith, allowing God to make us more like Christ – whatever it takes.
“Your lives are echoing the Master’s Word…. The news of your faith in God is out. We don’t even have to say anything anymore – you’re the message!” 1 Thessalonians 1:8 MSG (as quoted by the groom, describing his bride YunJin)
