“My precious…my precious!!”
For the lovers of cinema, those two words conjure up images of a shriveled up creature who has lost his identity in an object he could not let go of. He did everything he could to keep it but couldn’t. At the end (spoiler alert), he lost his life in a last ditch effort to reclaim what he thought was his. It wasn’t. It needed to be given up.
Are we much different than Gollum? I’m not. There are things that I am scared to give to God fearing that he is going to give me something completely terrible and that I don’t want.
There are things in my life that I have had a Gollum type hold on. And I’m tired of it. And I don’t want it to turn me into a shriveled, old man still holding on to “my precious”.
I think one of the things never mentioned but thought of from time to time on the Race is what’s going to happen when we get back home. I don’t have career or a degree or anything, so the range of things that could happen is great. I have done sales the better part of the last 4/5 years. What if God wants me to be in a field I have no experience in? What if I’m to go into some sort of ministry? I have lived in Miami my whole life. What if I were called to move to another city/state? What if I’m not in the country? (“my precious”)
Another popular topic amongst Christians is relationships, especially singles. By the world’s standards, at age 27 I should be married or in a relationship leading up to it by now. What if God wants me to wait another 27 years (or forever) to start a family? There’s lots of pressure to “wait for the person God is preparing for you”. What if I’m not attracted in any way to this person? What if I could just give the scenario to God and not worry about it? (“my precious”)
Lately, I’ve held competition to this fire. I’ve been associated with sports and competition since I can remember. In all truths, I’ve had an irrational hatred for all things NY Jets, NE Patriots, Buf Bills, Ohio ST, etc. What if my feelings comes from just being loyal to my favorite teams? What if I don’t really hate them since I don’t know them? I’m pretty sure God calls not to hate people because they’re rivals. How does this change my view of competitions that I’m involved in? Can I be satisfied with doing the best I can in a competition or does the outcome determine whether I’m a winner or loser? ("my precious")
This month has been full of tough questions and thoughts. What would it look like if I through “my precious” into the fire and trust God fully? This is a question I’ve considered over the last few weeks. The answer is how I am in the moment. I believe that God is magnificently huge! Like bigger than my thoughts can even make him. And he loves me. He wants great things for me. And he CAN be trusted.
Maybe for years I’ve held on to these things as precious and he has been waiting til now for me to release my Gollum-hold on things and allow him to take control.
As for now, I’m in the hands of the all-knowing, all-powerful God of the universe.
