Yesterday, I ran into a couple of former students. And, of course, their first question was, “Are you going to teach [in New Phila] again?” And I wanted to say yes. But, instead, with heavy hesitation, I explained that I wasn’t.
Maybe this isn’t a surprise to you by now. But, I am going back out on the field through the World Race. I was asked to be a Team Leader for an upcoming Squad going to Mongolia, China, and Kazakhstan. So, I have only been home for 7 days and I’ll be heading back to Atlanta on the 24th of July for reuniting with my squad and the for Training. I will be coming back home in November.
But, “how did this all come about,” you ask? Well, it’s complicated but I want to try and explain. So…
When I was in Thailand (about 4 months ago), a dear friend of mine made the observation of how I was going to hit the ground running if I had planned to go to the Anti-Human Trafficking School (with a return date of July 20th) and then starting Grad School in August. I knew she was right. So, I prayed about it. And I started feeling the Spirit challenging me to surrender. I wasn’t 100% sure what that meant but I called Walsh University to move my start date to January 2020 instead of August 2019.
The next month, in Cambodia, I found out that the Anti-Human Trafficking School wouldn’t be functioning due to security reasons. And I had recently been asked if I would consider Team Leading in August 2019.
So, I wrestled with God on this. Had He motivated me to push back my start date to January for this opportunity? Was I reading too much into this? Was I ready to tell New Phila I wasn’t coming back at the start of the school year…again? I felt pretty conflicted.
But, I started to feel the Spirit urging me on again. This time, I was being challenged on my trust in His provision. “Frieda, you’ve trusted Me this past year and you’ve seen My provision work. Do you know how to trust Me moving forward?”
And I knew my answer— no. No, I didn’t trust God’s provision 100% as I was preparing to step back into life in the States. I had a plan! I knew what awaited me at a secure job with NP, I was controlling my own schedule for Grad school, etc.
But, I wanted to grow in that trust. I have experienced God’s provision in incredible ways this past year and that is a trust I want to keep growing in. So, I made the decision to Team Lead.
Don’t get me wrong, telling New Phila that I wouldn’t be coming back for the start of the 2019 school year sucked. I am still grieving it. And after seeing my dear friends and colleagues as I have been home, and hearing them talk about the students and the EL program, I grieve it even more. Major FOMO happening.
And, I don’t really know what the plans are when I get back in early November. As of now, I plan to start Grad classes in January. But, 4 months ago, I was going to be attending an Anti-Human Trafficking School and attending Grad classes in August and we see how God moves quickly now…
I don’t know. And that’s okay. Because, today, and tomorrow, I choose surrender. I choose to Trust my God’s Provision.
So, friends and family, stay tuned 🙂
