You wouldn’t have been able to tell by looking at me but I am covered head to toe in ant bites. I got back from a long evening of ministry, far after dark, and found ants covering the inside of my tent. I didn’t think much of it. “put some bug spray on its to dark and late to worry about what they are doing in my tent right now. There can’t be that many” I thought.
Silly me, I had no idea that I would be eaten alive by the insects that had made there home in my very hot and very smelly tent. Looking through my things the next day I found that my very unfriendly roommates had brought back sugar that had spilled outside a few days prier and were storing it in my underwear bag… and all of my things were covered in ants. A battle for my tent broke out.
I am not sure if my reaction was justified or unnecessary but, first, I started to take all of my things out of my tent shaking and slapping all of the ants of as I did. Then, upon finding the sugar haven, I took my underwear to the back of the house and began to shake all the sugar and ants off of my cloths. Getting more and more ants on me as I worked at cleaning my tent was making me increasingly emotional moment by moment. “Why does things like this happen to me?” “There are five other people here and I am the one that has the problems.” I started to feel unprotected. My teammates were being healed of sickness and hearing great things from the Lord and it seemed that what the Lord was blessing me with was a tent full of itchy ants and a bunch of other unpleasant. I can hear my teammates laughing as I suffer through itchy skin and sweat to write down my frustration and anger…
Stop. Freeze. What is happening here? Have I reduced the goodness of the Lord to the turmoil created by the enemy? The temptation of sorrow, self pity, and isolation does NOT come from the Lord. James 1:13 says “Let no one say when he is tempted; ‘I am tempted by God’ for God cannot be tempted with evil, and he himself temps no one.” I have been able to be a part of smiling and dancing in my few days of ministry here in India. I have been a part of making people feel loved and encouraged. I am gifted in humor and excitement and care taking and love. Am I blind to the way I am being detoured? India is hot; more opportunities to sit outside talking and getting to know the people around you. We stay inside the gates most of the day; we are able to work on blogs, spend time with the Lord and relax. There are bugs but bugs to not define how my time here will be spent. The Lord as given me so many blessings.
The sun is bright here. The children are smiling and playing here. I met a little girl so full of joy. She smiled and gave cheek kisses and She and I decided on the second day of ministry we would wear making outfits. She was so happy when we got to there home and both had beautiful pink dresses on. I love the small ways we get to make people feel loved. The way the Lord is using me out weighs the moments of struggle.
The battle for our mind and body is most noticeable when we are bringing kingdom in the places the enemy thought he had won. When you feel as if you can not handle another moment remember that the battle has already been won. Every drop of the blood given on the cross has paid for every moment of suffering. It is finished.
