To the couple that taught me what Love looks like,
These are just some of the words I wrote to myself the morning after I met you.
Thank you.
______________
Last night was one of those nights that I’ll remember till I’m old and grey. It was one of those nights that showed me what really matters in life. It was one of those nights that entirely shifted the direction of the rest of my life. It was a night that caused me to vow to make my life one of selflessness and Love. And it starts with a woman named Deb and a man named Brad.
For the past nine months I’ve been traveling the world – it’s been wild. I’ve experienced brotherhood in the Philippines, open mindedness in Thailand, vulnerability with strangers in Malaysia, hope in brokenness in Lesotho, sweet restoration in Swaziland, true friendship and vision in South Africa, failed and exceeded expectation in Nicaragua, rest and bliss in Costa Rica. But even as I’ve explored and experienced our precious world, it was last night, here in Panama, that I experienced Love in a deeper, realer, more radical and overwhelming way than ever before. And it was all because our new friend, Deb decided to wave to us from her home.
Deb and Brad moved into the house next to our hosts’ last week, and already they’ve stolen each of our hearts. As we would walk by their house on our way to Danny and Heather’s, Deb would wave to us from her porch. That led to her and my dear friend, Stella, conversing through the fence, which led to Stella going inside for coffee, which then led to Deb inviting all seven of us over for dinner.
As we walked into their home we were greeted by the friendliest of smiles and the warmest of hugs. As I looked around I saw flats of water and Coke and Vitamin water sitting on their counters, surely there for strangers who became guests to drink at their pleasure. Their house wasn’t too big and wasn’t too small. It had just enough room for them and a guest room so others could stay over. It was perfect.
As the night went on Deb and Brad shared their hearts with us. They shared with us the funny stories of this thing they called their life, and they shared with us the beauty in their hearts. Deb began to tell us about their home in Washington State. She said that one day in the bitter cold of winter, while she and Brad were eating dinner inside, it dawned on the two of them that just outside their door were people, cold and hungry.
The two of them got up, went to the store to buy four loaves of bread, made some sandwiches, and went outside. As they ran into different individuals outside they would ask them how they’re doing and if they were hungry. If the answer was ‘yes’ Deb was ready with a sandwich in hand.
Deb and Brad did this every week. Each week they would make their sandwiches and go see their friends. Very quickly that evolved into coffee and tea, which then evolved into hot soups, which then evolved into bringing socks and mittens, blankets and sleeping bags. Deb recalled all the times Brad would come back without his hat or mitts, his coat, or even his shoes. She said with no hesitation in her voice “if they need it more than I do, they get it”.
And all of a sudden I got it.
This is what Love looks like.
It looks like waving to strangers on the street and inviting them in for coffee.
It looks like giving your shoes to those who need it more, whether that be a man on the street who doesn’t have any, or a tourist who got her shoe taken by a dog.
It looks like cooking together and feeding others.
It looks like calling nothing your own but sharing it all.
It looks like letting a Canadian come over to watch the Raptors make history because she doesn’t have a TV.
It looks like opening up your home to a new friend when they need a bed.
It looks like having arm wrestling competitions despite a 40-year difference.
It looks like inviting others to help you dig holes and garden together.
It looks like giving a bottle of water to a man on a horse as he passes by.
It looks like braiding a woman’s hair at the beach to make sure she knows she’s seen.
It looks like taking orders at the restaurant you don’t work at in a language you don’t speak in order to make friends.
I get it now.
This is what Love looks like.
And I want every part of it.
I want my home someday to be just like Deb and Brad’s. I want it to be kind of small, but with a guest room so people can come and stay. I want there to be flats of water and coke and vitamin water for people to drink when they come by. I want to invite strangers over to my home for dinner, for drinks, for whatever, and call them family. I want them to be overcome by this otherworldly Love. I want them to leave knowing that they are cherished and valued and that they are able to add good to the world too.
I vow from now on: if they need it more than I, they get it. If I come home with nothing, it’s worth it.
Brad and Deb, you welcomed us in, served us the yummiest food, and you shared your lives with us. You taught us what Love looks like.
Thank you.
