Have I ever told you how much I hate being sick? If not let me tell you, I hate being sick. It is one of the most humbling times of your life. Fact: My body hates me. It constantly tries to rebel and cause havoc. Being stubborn is quite a problem when you get sick a lot. You let it get way out of hand before you admit there is a problem. My pride is just a big problem. I am working on that.
The thing is…Swazi didn’t care. It totally ate my pride, multiple times. Headache after headache attacked me. Each day it would gain strength and each night it would knock me right out. No matter how early I went to bed it never seemed enough to kick the pain. Migraines set in and took root. Let me be real honest when I say it can get to the point where you cant ignore it any longer and it makes you completely angry. I hate being bitter and I hate even more being cranky. Again, Swazi just didn’t care.
As time progressed the headaches seemed to slow down and my throat started to amp up. My throat has never been so annoying until i joined the race….not cool. Finally I get over my pride and go to the doctor and find out I have Tonsillitis and Pharygitis. Seriously throat? Calm down! So frustrating, but thankfully there was a nice hospital that treated me well. I had an IV in for 3 days while each day I would go to get more medicine. It was inconvenient and terribly frustrating. I couldn’t talk normally and I had less than 10% energy. The cement walls were less than entertaining and I frankly was very bitter. Thankfully I got my IV out and was allowed to go to work for the last day of ministry. Although I wore a face mask it was totally worth it. I was getting back into peaceful and joyful days.
Then Swazi strikes again…I spend my last night walking up the hill by our homestead. I thought what better way would it be to spend the last night by watching the sunset. Also I hadn’t taken my Swazi handstand picture and I was running out of options and time. So the journey is wonderful, dodging cow poop every other step. However, surprisingly enough I step on something oddly painful. I thought hmm how did I not see that thorn bush? So I pridefully try to walk the pain out like I champ. Bad idea. As I finally get to the top of the hill I am in a ton of pain, my foot is bleeding, and my foot begins to swell. Don’t you worry though, I am way more stubborn that you think. I enjoyed that sunset and I got that dang picture!
As the night grew so did my foot. It began burning and going numb. I finally asked my team to look at it when we came to the conclusion that something must have actually bitten me. Thankfully our contact wasn’t to concerned and said to just take pain medicine to get over it. My team brought me a frozen banana and lots of love. As the night grew so did the pain but I just waited until morning. When the morning came I was just about crawling to get around. I hopped to the neighbors and asked for help…I mean we were leaving in a few hours. She had no idea and prayed over me and sent me straight to the hospital. Shocking I know but I was bitten by either a snake or scorpion. Most likely a scorpion because most snakes are deadly poisonous and well, Im still kicking. So of course I get a new IV in the other hand and they give me all the medicine. The pressure was on to get the swelling down before I got on the plane. So as we traveled back to South Africa I had to ride with my feet as high as it could go. Too bad the medicine started working and decided that the poison needed to come out in all the ways. (Sorry team on the bus!!!). However, God is good and the swelling did come down a lot before we flew out. I slept on the airport floor that night like a champ with my foot just dangling in the air. It was clearly a beautiful site. Sorry this wasn’t documented.
The traveling consisted of over 57 hours but in all honest God truly provided healing. Although it was difficult, I was completely blessed. As we arrived in Ireland I was ready for a fresh start. Of course the Devil thinks it was funny to continue to mess with me but thankfully my God is way stronger. This week I have been trapped in bed with a Virus from Hades. I literally didn’t see the light at the end of the tunnel. However this church is so rooted in the power of prayer. Once again my Heavenly Father provided and showed favor unto me. I am now doing so much better and able to go out and love His people. Surprisingly enough this week I got an ovarian cyst. Life? Body? WHY? But that's okay, because after a few days it ruptured and I am doing much better.
I will totally not be upset if I don’t have to be sick again however I know that like always my God is big and will provide. I know this is a blog about sad and boring things but its a big deal to me. God had to wake me up and show me his love in drastic ways. I am thankful for these times because I have grown closer to him and gained so much faith. I know that this pain doesn’t compare to a lot of things others go through but I do want you to know that our Heavenly Father is greater than all of the pain in the world. If you are struggling to find the light at the end of the tunnel I promise it is there. God is not hiding and his arms are wide open waiting for you to embrace him.
Put your stubborn pride aside and accept the crazy love he has for you. (I cant say that enough to myself) So I ask you to please be praying for me as I walk through this lack of trust and faith. That I let myself go, so that I can embrace God in so many new ways.
