So this is it… I leave in half an hour to fly back to Thailand and to resume the Race.
For those of you I didn’t tell: I flew home for 5days to attend my Grandfathers funeral. If you didn’t get to see me while I was in town, I’m sorry, it wasn’t a reunion and I didn’t tell many people. I didn’t want this to be more overwhelming than it already has been.
Anyways – back to the story… Redemption.
Have I told you that God is good lately? Because He is, and He loves me so well.
As soon as I found out I was flying back for the funeral – I texted my friend Gabriella Denbow. Being on the Race for 9months, I had missed the entirety of her pregnancy. I have been friends with this girl since I was 2years old, I was her maid of honor at her wedding nearly three years ago, and I love her dearly.
Being a missionary overseas you learn to accept that you are going to miss important milestones in your friends and families lives – but it doesn’t make it any easier.
I told her about my return, asked her if I could see her pregnant, and found out that she could possibly give birth while I was in town… Hearing this possibility I did what every spoiled child would do, I begged my Heavenly Faither if I could have this present!
I immediately sent out prayer email asking my prayer warriors to stand with me and 1 – pray for my family and our loss 2- pray for our travels and 3 – pray that I selfishly got to meet this little bundle of joy while I was home!
Well – prayer works. If you don’t believe me from my last blog posts I hope you see it in this one. My flight home was simply perfect. The first flight I was with my mother – in the same row, with no one sitting in between us. The second flight I arrived at my gate while we were boarding and again… Sat in a row with only two people, me and a sweet older lady. Third flight, I again made it to my gate just in time (even though I had to go through customs and security again), and got bumped up to first class. What?! Best flying experience of my life. Thank you prayer warriors and thank you Jesus. I feel the favor of the Lord resting upon me daily, and I absolutely am relishing in it.
Secondly, Gabriella had the baby!
Nolan Keyes Denbow was born at 11:39pm on May 5th (a week early mind you). I got to see Him May, 8th – almost three days old! Holding this sweet baby was so healing to my soul.
I flew home to celebrate the life of my grandfather, and during the same trip I received the gift of celebrating new birth into the world.
Not to mention, I also got to celebrate my little sister receiving her Yoga Teaching Certificate the day after my flight got in!
How God beautifully orchestrates every day of my life is still completely mind blowing to me. I’ve been working on this surrendering thing, but I never realized how rewarding it truly is.
I’ve waisted so much of my life trying to control my own life, plan what I think is best for me, and make my life “perfect”… What I’m realizing is that my life has never been as great as it is now – and I am living in complete surrender to my Lord. The amount of God’s favor I can feel resting on me is amazing. The amount of His grace, peace, and His love.
Walking in obedience isn’t taxing or daunting like I use to feel it was. It’s actually rewarding! I understand the bible so much more clearly now. This isn’t just a book with a list of do’s and donts, and it isn’t just a story. I don’t need to feel controlled by all of the commandments.
1 John 3:21-22 “Dear friends, if our hearts do not condemn us, we have confidence before God and receive from him anything we ask, because we keep his commands and do what pleases him.”
Now that I am so in love with my savior, I want to obey. I want to listen. I desire to honor him. It isn’t difficult. Obedience is truly rewarding and it gets easier day by day. I crave His word. I crave His presence. I even miss my crazy Race community of believers, and it’s only been 5days!
My God is a redeemer. My God is compassionate. My God loves me, and He loves me so well.
Yes, this week at home was difficult (I’m writing a short blog about culture shock that I’ll post shortly and death is never ever easy), but it was also eye opening.
I don’t think I ever fully realized how much my Lord wants to bless me. How much He wants to reward His obedient children. How much He will divinely orchestrate your life IF you let Him.
God I am living with my hands wide open. I am surrendering my life completely to you, and I will stand worshipping you as You take the reigns! I don’t want control. I am free! I know I can completely depend on You, because I truly believe that no matter what the outcome – it is for Your glory. No matter what happens to me and what happens in my life, it is Your will.
1 John 5:3 “For this is the love of God, that we keep His commandments; and His commandments are not burdensome.”
