30 days. I leave in 30 days. I leave for nine months to go to places I’ve never been with girls I barely know to proclaim the gospel to everyone I cross paths with. I’m leaving everything I’ve ever known; family, friends, work, all for the unknown. I’m leaving the life I have built for myself to pursue the life God has planned for me. The unknown path ahead of me is daunting… but also exciting and, in a way, relieving.
So much of our lives are built around schedules and responsibilities. What do I have to do next? What do I need to get done today? I enjoy making plans and having a schedule… the downfall is I feel as though they get in the way of what God’s plan for that day. It’s relieving, in a way, to not know the exact plan for everyday on the field. When people ask what I’ll be doing on the field, I enjoy answering with “I don’t really know.” In a culture that puts knowledge up on a pedestal, I’ve learned to be okay with not knowing where my life is headed, not knowing what’s going to happen on the field or afterwards for that matter. I don’t have to have a plan, I just need to know the one who does. God has taught me and shownme, He already has everything in place, the path is laid, the way is clear. He is in control. To me, that is indefinitely more comforting than any schedule I can make for myself.
Reality sinks in a little deeper with everyday closer to October 1st. To say the least, I’m terrified… so I don’t think about leaving… which is easy in the normalcy of everyday life. It’s already hard to believe training camp happened just a week ago. I somehow thought it would be harder to adjust back into my “normal” life… but here I am caught up in work and friends and schedules again. I want change but I’m still holding on to complacency. God has not called us to live in comfort. He has called us to the hard places, the ones where no one else will go.
4 weeks. 4 weeks to say goodbye and start putting the truths of training camp into practice. You know, the race already started, I’m already on an adventures, it started the minute I realized Jesus died for me.
