Going home- a phrase I have yearned for and been scared of all at the same time. Why have I yearned for home? Well, I have yearned for my mom’s loving hugs and comforting words. Watching tv and getting Taco Bell with my sister. My long FaceTime calls with my bestie. Hearing the familiar and warming sounds of my dad’s voice scad-a-dat-taing along to whatever station he puts on throughout the house. I am excited to have my comforts of a warm shower with no bugs as my showering buddies, my bed and room with the only other living thing in it is my dog, clothes that do not have mold or stains all over it, or just having food that will not upset my stomach. I am excited to go home but, I am also scared. Scared because it is not the same home I left 9 months ago. Yes, it is in the same place and most physical things have not changed but, the people and life around it have… I have.
I am not the same Esther that left 9 months ago for Gainesville, GA. I am not even the same Esther that left back in January overseas. The Lord has COMPLETELY changed my life and frankly, I do not want my old life back. He has led me into such a sweet and deeper dependence on him as well as a trusting that he gives new mercies every day. As we have less than two weeks left I think about home a lot. I know that no one is going to truly understand what I have gone through and what my life has been these past 9 months. Heck, I am not going to understand their lives the past 9 months, but my prayer is that when I get home I do not shut up about how amazing our God is. I want to share what the Lord has done. All the amazing things I have seen the Lord do and is doing! I will not be able to completely explain everything, there are some things that you can not fully put into words, but I do not want to let that stop me. I want to share all the Lord has done. Yeah, it is scary, but we can do scary things! Going Home… the next thing the Lord and I get to walk through and partner in all for his glory. And yeah I’m excited to share all the stories you want me to! I have some pretty good ones!
