sludge and spreadsheets

Its been a long week already. We all have those weeks.

I returned home from the Philippines on Saturday night and I had to sort out the finances from launching 2 separate squads at once. It has pretty much taken me hours of sitting behind my desk computing and looking up accounting codes and calculating project expenses this week. NOT really fun and honestly, I’ve had a pretty short attention span and even shorter good attitude about it. Theres always something more on my plate, more emails in the inbox, more questions to answer, more spreadsheets and things to plan and sometimes I just want to throw my arms out to the side and brace myself so it all stops for a second and I can catch my breath. I just need a minute, sometimes, ya know?

And then I saw this today:

Tiffany Birkowitz uploaded some photos to facebook documenting two of her squad’s teams in Manila serving with a local ministry. I scrolled through looking at all the familiar faces from launch last week scooping up what appears to be mud, but in fact is toxic waste, human feces, garbage and as Tiffany says, “any other putrid thing you could possibly imagine.”

Looking at these pictures changed things for me.

I remembered my time on the field. Doing similar tasks.
I remembered worshipping last week behind these men and women and getting glimpses of them bringing Kingdom and fruitfulness to places that looked just like this:

I remembered why I was crunching all these numbers and doing these calculations.
AND I remembered why I am even on this earth at all.

Sometimes I struggle with my missionary work not looking a certain way. Maybe that sounds silly but I wish I were shoveling sludge today. Instead of wielding a shovel alongside these racers I am wielding my calculator and page full of accounting codes. It gets tedious and tiresome in a different kind of way. But its all unto the same thing- the same One. God never lets me stay in that place of self-pity very long. I can’t afford to. I have things to do. Words to speak. Light to bring…and spreadsheets to finish!

So today my perspective is adjusted and my strength is renewed because of a few pictures I saw on facebook.